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CIA agents can’t spy because that might require them to break laws in foreign countries. They are perfectly willing to break U.S. laws to leak national security secrets to the media, but not in order to acquire valuable intelligence on other countries. CIA officers spend their days finding reasons to do nothing and then, a month later, say, “Yeah, we heard that request a few weeks ago. Let me tell you why we can’t do it.” It was constantly being leaked that Dick Cheney was demanding that the CIA do something insane. You want us to infiltrate al Qaeda? We can’t do that!

But whenever anyone mentioned this about the Iranian nukes leak, Keith accused the “neocons” of choosing “to slander the intelligence community.”23

Even the New York Times, of all places, ran a column by two outside experts on Iran’s nuclear programs that ridiculed the NIE’s conclusion. Gary Milhollin of the Wisconsin Project on Nuclear Arms Control and Valerie Lincy of Iranwatch.org cited Iran’s operation of three thousand gas centrifuges at its plant at Natanz, as well as a heavy-water reactor being built at Arak, neither of which had any peaceful energy purpose. (If only there were something plentiful in Iran that could be used for energy!)

Weirdly, our intelligence agencies missed those nuclear operations.24 They were too busy reading an article in the Tehran Tattler, “Iran Now Loves Israel.”

Even if you weren’t aware that the United States has the worst intelligence in the world, and even if you didn’t notice that the leak was timed perfectly to embarrass Bush, wouldn’t any normal person be suspicious of a report concluding Ahmadinejad was behaving like a prince?

Not liberals. Our intelligence agencies concluded Iran had suspended its nuclear program in 2003, so Bush owed Ahmadinejad an apology. Any military response was scuttled. Indeed, then-Senator Joe Biden threatened Bush with impeachment if he bombed Iran.

Then, on February 11, 2010—about a year after Bush left the White House—Ahmadinejad announced that Iran was “a nuclear state.” So it would appear that Iran’s nuclear program hadn’t been completely abandoned in 2003. Can we get an apology from liberals? How about after Ahmadinejad drops his first bomb?

Once again, the Left had made triumphal accusations that turned out to be completely wrong—and then we never heard about it again.

In the fall of 2009, the naked body of census worker Bill Sparkman was found hanging from a tree in southwestern Kentucky. Liberals wasted no time in leaping to the conclusion that right-wing extremists had murdered him in a burst of anti-government hate.

A census worker? Lots of Americans—including the liberal ACLU—objected to the detailed personal questions included in the long form of the modern census that go far beyond the “actual enumeration” called for in the Constitution. So did lots of non-Americans worried about their illegal status being revealed to immigration authorities. Presumably, those people didn’t answer the personal questions on their census forms. Other than that, a census worker isn’t a particularly reviled figure. He’s not an IRS agent, who can threaten you with penalties and jail time, an EPA inspector with the power to declare your swamp a federally protected wetland, or an Agriculture inspector, who can arrest you, seize your tractor, and fine you hundreds of thousands of dollars for running over rats. A census worker just asks you to fill out a form but has no power to impose punishment.

Even the New York Times wasn’t buying the idea of a right-wing militia type murdering a census worker, running only a short, terse AP item about the death. Stranger still, Frank Rich sat this conspiracy theory out.

But the liberal idiocracy was ablaze with fantasies of a violent right-wing uprising sweeping America. After categorically announcing that the census worker’s death was “not suicide”—that’s “the one thing we know for certain”—the Atlantic’s Andrew Sullivan blamed “Southern populist terrorism” for his death, “whipped up by the GOP and its