Diaries 1969-1979_ The Python Years - Michael Palin [60]
Notes that stuck in my mind – a small Andy Capp-like figure telling the platform with a feeling of frustrated sadness, ‘Living round here is bloody terrible.’ The soft-voiced, inoffensive, architect taking on the wrath of the gathering as well as its repartee. He was talking of how, even when the builders were working, ‘Lismore Circus retained its trees, its flowers, even squirrels …’ – ‘and rats’ came a voice from the audience. The lack of enthusiasm for the plans from the audience was understandable, but very, very sad. For here was an enlightened borough, with a good and humane record, selling something that people didn’t want in the most democratic way possible.
Friday, October 27th
An eventful day. Began with a Python meeting at John’s to discuss future long-term plans. An interesting thing happened. I had originally told Charisma that we did not want individual writing credits for the two sides of the single (‘Eric the Half-Bee’ by Eric and John and ‘Yangtse Song’ by myself and Terry) on the grounds that Python had never before singled out writers’ specific contributions. But Eric had told Jim that he wanted his name on the single. So this was the first awkward point that I brought up with John and Eric this morning. Predictably Eric bristled, but with a bitterness that I didn’t expect. He wanted his name on the record because he was going to write more songs and this would help him. He lashed out bitterly at what he thought was merely a weak-kneed way of protecting Graham. John, however, agreed with me – that the principle of Python’s ‘collective responsibility’ was more important. Eric went quiet, John went out to make coffee. I felt bad vibrations and tried to think of a compromise. But as suddenly as the storm broke it was over. Eric apologised, said I was absolutely right and that he was being stupid about it – but all this came out in such a way that I felt a warm flood of friendship as well as considerable relief.
After the meeting we all drove over to the BBC to see Duncan Wood and discuss the cuts he proposed in our new series. These cuts involved the excision of whole sketches about a French wine-taster who serves his clients only wee-wee, and an awful City cocktail bar where upper-class twits ask for strange cocktails – one of which, a mallard fizz, involves cutting the head off a live duck. Other cuts included the word ‘masturbating’ (a contestant in a quiz game gives his hobbies as ‘golf, strangling animals and masturbating’), the phrase ‘I’m getting pissed tonight’ and most of two sketches, one about a Dirty Vicar and the other about the Oscar Wilde Café Royal set, who run short of repartee and at one point liken King Edward VII to a stream of bat’s piss. But we were protesting mainly about the volume of the cuts, not particular instances – tho’Terry crusaded violently on behalf of masturbating, launching off at a Kinseyian tangent about the benefits of masturbation. ‘I masturbate, you masturbate, we all masturbate!’ he enthused. Duncan crossed his legs and pulled hard on his cigarette. Our point was basically why, if we are going out at 10.15 – well after children and family peak viewing – are we suddenly being so heavily censored?
Duncan Wood at first protested that we weren’t being heavily censored, that four cuts in the first nine shows wasn’t bad (I must say in the first of the series we got away with the line from a judge, ‘Screw the Bible, I’ve got a gay lib meeting at 6.00,’ which certainly couldn’t be spoken on any other TV ser-vice in the world). So he has clearly relented over certain of the cuts he wanted Ian to make. He promised to review Shows 12 and 13 again, with us, so that we could all see what we were talking about.
After the sting had been taken out of the meeting we got to talking about censorship generally – and why the BBC seemed to be suddenly more frightened of causing offence. Genial Duncan chain-smoked