Doctor Who_ The Also People - Ben Aaronovitch [133]
'Once it arrives,' he said, 'we have to get in as fast as possible to stop God getting one of its bugs inside.'
Bernice shook Kadiatu's hand. 'Take care,' she said.
'Got any last-minute advice?' asked Kadiatu.
'Start small,' said Bernice. 'Overbearing postmen, malfunctioning traffic-lights, that sort of thing. And take care of aM!xitsa, it doesn't know what it's letting itself in for.'
'Don't worry,' said Kadiatu, 'I'll be modest and meek . . .'
Bernice punched the tall woman in the face with all her strength.
The blow never connected. Kadiatu simply lifted her hand and caught Bernice's fist on her palm.
Bernice winced at the pain in her knuckles. It was like punching a brick wall. Paper wraps stone, said a little girl voice in her head.
Kadiatu released Bernice's hand and looked at her strangely. 'That was very dangerous,' she said quietly.
'I had to be sure,' said Bernice.
'Look after him,' said Kadiatu.
'I'll do my best.'
The Doctor looked at Kadiatu. 'When you get round to building your you-know-what, make sure you build it away from here so that you-know-who doesn't find out the precise details of how it's done. Otherwise those that shall remain nameless will be a bit annoyed that I've broken the treaty and do unspeakable things to my head the next time I'm you-know-where. Got that?'
'No problem,' said Kadiatu. 'Trust me.'
'When you're quite ready, Christopher,' said the Doctor.
Dep let go of Chris with extreme reluctance and then, without saying anything, turned and ran up the path. Chris watched her until she vanished out of sight and then told the Doctor he was ready. Roz put a companionable hand on his shoulder.
'On a count of three,' said the Doctor.
The familiar wheezing groan of the space-time continuum reluctantly conceding to superior technology echoed around the clearing. With its flashing blue lamp becoming visible first the TARDIS materialized.
'One, two, three – GO!' said the Doctor.
They found Wolsey curled up in his usual place on top of the time rotor. The cat opened one incurious eye as they charged in through the main doors, as if to imply that it was supremely indifferent about their very existence. Exactly the attitude you'd expect, thought Bernice, from a cat who had been left alone for a while with an automated food dispenser.
The Doctor banged the door control down and immediately started punching in co-ordinates.
The time rotor began to rise and fall: Wolsey started to purr. The Doctor relaxed.
Bernice thought of Kadiatu and aM!xitsa who even now were probably building their own TARDIS analogue, unless they'd already built it or hadn't even started, or didn't even exist yet.
She wondered what their TARDIS would look like on the inside.
'I can't believe you left them behind,' said Roz. 'They were the only pair of uniform boots that fit properly.'
'I thought you had them,' said Chris.
'Do you know how long it took me to wear them in? It's not like we can pop back and get them, is it?'
Home again, home again, thought Bernice, jiggidy jig.
Epilogue
By far the cleverest animal in the forest was Tsuro the hare and a list of his many adventures would take a storyteller many years to recount. He travelled far and wide in the world and the fame of his tricks grew with every telling. So great was his fame that Tsuro was often welcomed into villages that were beset by troubles or under evil influences. 'Help us, o clever Hare,' the people would cry and Tsuro would help them but not always in a manner that they liked.
And yet deep within himself Tsuro the hare held a secret sadness, for long ago when he had been a young animal the other hares had cast him out of his village. 'You are too full of pride,'
said the Chief of the Hares. 'If you will not live within the customs of your people you must live without them.' And so Tsuro was set on his travels without family, wife or children. 'If I cannot have family amongst the Hares,' said Tsuro,