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'Miss Waugh,' the Doctor beamed, 'good of you to join us.'

She smiled, kissing the Doctor on the cheek. 'I'm sorry we're late. The motorway was at a standstill - police roadblocks at every junction. It was causing tailback, fender-benders, chaos. Who's this?' she asked, looking over at him.

The Brigadier introduced himself, but didn't shake her hand.

'UNIT... ' Miss Waugh breathed. 'You were the head of UNIT in this country during the seventies.'

'That's meant to be classified,' Lethbridge-Stewart joked. Twenty years ago, only a handful of people had known that information, but nowadays it was an open secret. His picture had appeared dozens of times over the years in various newspapers and books.

***

The Doctor hurriedly introduced the woman and her cameraman, Alan, to him. The Brigadier watched them carefully, and asked them to leave the camera bag and Eve's mobile phone in the hall. They agreed, and the Doctor led them through into one of the dining rooms, so as not to disturb Ms Summerfield.

***

The humans were taking their places around tables. They were divided into groups of six or seven. Xznaal was sitting in a chair designed for a human.

Xztaynz was talking to Gerayhayvun. They were speaking quietly, but Xznaal could hear them. 'You can't be going through with this?'

'Of course I am.'

'That is not the Archbishop of Canterbury.' Xztaynz waved a withered claw at a human animal in flowing purple robes, who was muttering the words of some pagan ceremony.

'Oh, he's near enough,' Gerayhayvun said breezily.

A hundred human eyes were watching Xznaal, with a mixture of curiosity and respect. The tables were piled high with food - steaming animal carcasses, vegetables, fruit.

Xznaal had read an oath, and this had been the cause of some consternation in the crowd. Now the purple robed human came forwards with a gold implement. He was a priest of some kind.

'If you could move onto King Edward's chair,' he prompted, indicating the adjacent seat.

'Why?'

'Because that is how the ceremony goes.'

Xznaal grunted and complied.

Once he was settled, the priest held out a gold implement and lunged at Xznaal with it. The Martian caught the priest's wrist, making the human scream.

'What iss thiss?' he demanded.

The priest was in some pain, indicating that human nervous development had reached a more highly-evolved state than Xznaal had thought. 'It i-is the Anointing Spoon, your, er, your majesty,' the human bleated.

'I ssee. Explain the ritualss ass you perform them.'

'As you wish. The holy oil has been stored in the Ampul a, now it has been transferred to the Anointing Spoon. I dab oil onto your er, hands, your breast and the crown of your head. This is the most sacred part of the ceremony.

It was first performed in 785 on Egfrith, King of Merc- '

'Enough explanation. Continue.'

The priest ushered in a couple of human helpers. 'Now the investment of the royal robes and other ornaments, each of which symbolises a part of your kingdom, physical and spiritual.'

'I ssee. You want me to wear thesse garmentss?'

The priest held out a white, sleeveless piece of cloth. 'This is the Colobium Sindonis, this,' he lifted up a thick gold cloak with crimson lining, 'is the Supertunica, or the Dalmatic - '

79

Xznaal struggled into them, ripping the first. The heavy cloak was enough to keep him pinned down on the throne.

He waved his claw to indicate that he was still conscious.

A human touched Xznaal's feet with tiny gold spikes.

'You are now a knight of the realm, Sir Xznaal,' the priest explained. 'A necessary condition for your coronation.

Now, if you could take the Sword of Offering - ' Xznaal took it in a single claw and examined it. Unlike the ceremonial swords of Mars it had clearly never been used in combat, but it was a great deal more ornate - the hilt and scabbard glittered with gemstones: diamonds, rubies, sapphires and emeralds. Unsheathing the blade, Xznaal was pleased to see that the sword was