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Doctor Who_ The Gunfighters - Donald Cotton [25]

By Root 409 0
the last time, I tell you that man is not Doc Holliday! I don’t care what Earp said – he’s nothing like him! I don’t suppose,’ he added, not being entirely sure on that point.

‘He sure enough shoots like him,’ said Seth, ruefully.

‘Sure ‘nough does!’ agreed the others. ‘Fast? We ain’t never seen nothin’ like it! We said so at the time, if you remember?’

‘But he didn’t fire that shot! He probably wouldn’t know how.’

‘Haw! Haw!’ they went, with subtle sarcasm – rather like a rookery in the Springtime.

‘In any case, the bullet came from upstairs – I was watching!’

‘Well, Glory be!’ admired Phineas, ‘He got eyes like a bald eagle, this feller! He can watch bullets come an’ go like they was flappin’ their wings!’

This was his best yet; and there was a short pause for refreshment, while they congratulated him.

‘Never mind all that,’ said Steven, irritably. ‘You’ll simply have to take my word for it.’

They fell about some more.

‘Because what I’ve got to do now is get him out of gaol...’

‘Stop it!’ they begged. ‘Oh, please – no!’

And they wiped their streaming noses on the table-cloth.

‘I don’t see what’s so funny – the Marshal had absolutely no right to arrest him!’

‘So what you’re goin’ fer to do, I take it,’ said Ike, when he felt better, ‘is you’re... oh, dear... you’re gonna walk right down into that there abode of the righteous, gun down Earp and Masterson... an’ then you an’ your friend, who ain’t by no means Doc Holliday, is jest gonna ride your sweet way outa town? Is that it?’

‘Well, no – not exactly,’ Steven admitted. ‘No, I shall reason with them. I mean, they’re both intelligent men –

they’re bound to see there’s just been a misunderstanding...

I should think...’

‘Boys,’ said Ike, ‘seems to me like our young pal here could use a little help.’

‘Sure could,’ the rest agreed.

‘You see, Mr Regret,’ continued Ike, ‘to my way of thinkin’, it looks like we all got us the same problem: namely, how to restore your partner to the fresh, pure air of liberty...’

‘That’s right,’ Phineas agreed. ‘So’s we can blast the livin’ day...’

‘Shut up, Phin! So’s we can have a little talk, an’ find out who he really is. Because, if he really ain’t the Doc, like you say... well, we wouldn’t want to see no miscarriage of justice, would we, boys?’

Here he winked laboriously at all brothers within eye-shot.

‘Certainly wouldn’t,’ they assured him. ‘That would be too damn’ bad!’

‘So we got to think us of a plan.’

‘I’ve been trying to,’ said Steven.

‘Then you can lay off right now – ‘cause I just thought me of a dilly! It’s simple, it’s effective; and furthermore, it’s traditional! You boys know what I’m talkin’ about?’

They didn’t.

‘Well then, look-ee here: all we gotta do is get us a rope.’

They liked that.

‘Then we tie it round the neck of Mr Regret, here; an’

we lead him, like he was a hound-dog, to the hangin’-tree in front of the gaol-house. So then, if his friend don’t come out, to take his place...’

‘What?’ gulped Steven.

‘Why then, we’re simply goin’ to have to pretend to lynch you...’

‘Pretend?’

‘Why sure; unless somethin’ happens to get us riled –

like maybe, Wyatt an’ Bat tearin’ into us with shotguns, or some such... but no – they’d never do that, with you standin’ right there in front of us, would they now?’

‘Suppose they do?’

‘Well then,’ said Ike, reasonably, ‘in that far-fetched eventuality, we’d jest have to review the situation some.

Play it by ear,’ he explained, ‘where the knot’ll be...’

He sat back; like Napoleon rolling up the map of Europe. Yes, he was pleased with his plan.

‘Reckon it’ll work?’ demanded Billy.

‘Why, boy, don’t you ever read nothin’ bar Wells Fargo catalogues? Of course it’ll work. It always works. A man has to come out to save his friend, don’t he? Irrespective of any small, personal risk? I tell you, it’s traditional! So what do you all say?’

By a majority of four to one, Charlie abstaining, the motion was carried; and, mumbling something about frogs, Phineas lumbered off to find them a hempen neck-tie.

14

The Law and Doc Holliday

Upstairs, there was

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