Doctor Who_ The Infinity Doctors - Lance Parkin [114]
‘Well, Doctor?’
‘Perfectly well, thank you, Lord Omega.’ He closed the menu and then opened it up. Once again it seemed to open in the middle. This time it was halfway through listing all the Main Courses, in tiny writing. This page listed three dozen variations of beef dishes. He rifled through the book, a dozen pages at a time, but never seemed to approach the end.
Finally, he slammed it shut.
‘The best thing about books,’ the Doctor confided to his fellow diners, ‘Is that you can always tell when you’re getting to the end. No matter how tricky the situation the hero’s in, you hold the book in your hand and think, “Hang on, I’m two hundred and twenty-nine pages in, with only another fifty-one to go. It started slow, but it’s building to a climax.” This menu, though, with every single detail spelled out for you on an infinite number of pages is just dull. Where’s the fun if everything’s possible?’
Omega glowered at him.
‘I’ll just have a glass of water, please.’ It appeared in front of him. ‘And the bill.’
‘You’re my guest.’
The Doctor sipped at his water. ‘Tanstaafl. There ain’t no such thing as a free lunch. We both know that I was brought here for a reason. If we could get down to business.’
Omega placed his drumstick on his plate, where it dissolved.
‘I want to cross back to the universe of matter.’
‘Well,’ the Doctor said, taking a deep breath, ‘you can’t have everything that you want.’
Omega rumbled, the castle shaking a little.
‘There’s no use rumbling,’ the Doctor said scathingly. ‘It’s not possible. Your consciousness is needed to maintain this universe you’ve created, without you all order will end. But you’re a part of this universe. You can’t leave without destroying yourself. You’ve been here for two million years, an infinite amount of power at your disposal, and you’ve not worked out a way around that problem. I’m very flattered that you think that I’ll work out a way over dinner, but…
sometimes there just isn’t a solution.’
‘You are very perceptive,’ Omega growled.
‘Well, yes,’ the Doctor agreed. ‘Now, the solution seems obvious: get another consciousness in to take the burden from you. He maintains the universe while you make your escape. That’s the deal you offered Savar – to be a god here in this infinite gilded cage. But Savar didn’t like the terms, and all you managed to do was make him especially sensitive to the ravages of the Effect. I take it that you are behind his transformations?’
Omega nodded.
‘So you started fishing around the universe, looking for another candidate. A Time Lord on the brink of death, someone with nothing to lose. You’d answer their prayers, not only give them life, but eternal life.
The Doctor glanced across the table, smiled across at his wife. ‘But our mutual friend here refused.’
‘No,’ she said softly. ‘No, I didn’t.’
Omega’s laughter filled the room again.
The Doctor looked around, a little disconcerted.
‘Tell him,’ he commanded.
‘I was killed,’ she said calmly. ‘A bullet in the back of the head. Not enough of my brain survived to initiate or control the regeneration process. I would have died. Omega was watching me, he removed in from spacetime, the instant before my death. I materialised on a vast expanse of grey sand, naked and alone. I thought it was the afterlife, and in a way it was.’
‘After a while, I made myself known to her, made her comfortable.’
‘I’m sure you did,’ the Doctor said. ‘After all, you had so much to gain if she accepted the terms of your offer.’
‘Listen to him, Doctor. He saved my life.’
‘For a reason,’ he replied. ‘He wanted his freedom in return. If Omega simply wanted to save you, he could have manipulated the timelines, made it so the bullet missed. I was testing you out on that one before, and you proved you could bring Larna back to life without having to bring her here.’
‘Perfectly correct.’
‘But your little scheme didn’t work, did it? Why not? Her consciousness should have been enough. That’s been bothering me. Is that why you brought me here? To find out why it didn’t work?’
‘You are not here to provide