Doctor Who_ The Stone Rose - Jacqueline Rayner [62]
Rose peered at the scanner. ‘Why have some of the little models got blindfolds on? Are all her worshippers s’posed to be ugly or something?’
‘Blind fortune. She doesn’t judge who deserves her favours, she just throws them out at random. Like a bride chucking her bouquet.’ The Doctor grimaced. ‘I caught a bouquet once and nearly ended up married to an elephant.’
‘Not a looker, then, was she?’ asked Rose.
‘No, an actual elephant – the emperor of Golibo’s favourite pet. Can you imagine the bit where they say “You may now kiss the bride”? Those tusks!’
‘So what happened?’
‘Luckily my fiancee ate the bouquet, invalidating the contract. And I did what is technically known as “a runner”. Now, shall we get on with it?’
But Rose was doubled up with laughter. ‘Had… had…’
‘What? Ha ha, the Doctor nearly married an elephant… You never nearly married anyone you shouldn’t have? Let’s get on with it.’
‘Had… had…’
‘Rose!’
Rose nearly exploded. ‘Had she already packed her trunk for the honeymoon?’ She fell about again.
The Doctor stood, arms crossed, looking at her with a stony face that made her laugh even more.
‘Got that out of your system?’
She nodded, still sniggering.
‘Then can we get on with stopping time and space from ripping apart? We can? Then let’s get on with it.’
Rose composed herself and raised her hands in a ‘what?’ gesture.
‘Right. You’re Fortuna, you hide behind the statue, you don’t, repeat don’t, let me see you; and you wait until Gracilis has picked up the phial and left before you come out again. Oh, and take this – it’ll disguise your voice. OK?’ He handed her a small metal device and hustled her towards the door. ‘Go go go!’
‘Hang on,’ said Rose, trying to dig in her heels. ‘Can’t I have a rehearsal or something?’
The Doctor glanced at the scanner. ‘No time! I’m going to be here any second! Oh, and Rose –’
She turned back. ‘Mm?’
‘Yeah, I’m afraid she had. Packed her trunk. And said goodbye to the circus.’ He gave her a big grin – and propelled her through the doors.
* * *
Rose found herself stumbling out into the shrine, and the TARDIS doors slammed behind her. The time machine was soon swallowed up in the gloom as she made her way to the statue that the Doctor had indicated. It was a bit of a squeeze to get behind and she could only hope that the gloom would disguise her too; she felt that bits of her were sticking out all over the place.
She had just settled down and adjusted the metal box thing over her mouth, when the door to the shrine opened. She peered through Fortuna’s legs and saw that, yes, it was the Doctor. He saw the statue. She shrank back as he hurried forward… and then he realised that it wasn’t her.
Rose was taken aback. She hadn’t known – how could she know? – what her disappearance had done to him. This Doctor had a look of such despair in his eyes that her heart almost stopped in pity. She wanted more than anything else in the world to jump up, go to him, tell him that everything was going to be all right.
But, what with possibly ripping time and space apart, that was probably a bad idea.
‘Rose is prettier than you,’ the Doctor suddenly said.
‘Thanks!’ she said, before she could stop herself.
She bit her tongue. Quick, better follow on with the rest of it before he got too suspicious. The box over her mouth made her sound more like Cher than Rose, but she put on her best ‘goddess’ voice anyway and said, ‘This’ll bring Rose back to life – and the others. All praise to me – that is, Fortuna,’, she hastily clarified, ‘and all that.’
She bent down as low as she could, and carefully – oh, so carefully