Doctor Who_ Trading Futures - Lance Parkin [84]
One of the control panels was open, and the components inside were, variously, reconnected, disconnected or just lying in bits on the floor.
Pad had explained the exact functions of the bits of electronics. It all sounded fascinating, and Fitz harboured a degree of regret that he wouldn’t be around to become a travelling EMP cannon repairman.
He connected the emitter power supply to the emergency buffer. Apparently. He stuck the big fat silver connector into the big green socket.
‘Almost there?’ he asked.
‘Just four more connections,’ Pad said cheerfully.
‘You know what I’m planning to do here?’
‘Of course, sir. The EMP cannon generates a vast amount of energy. You intend to channel that into the ship, rather than away from it. You want to attach the two yellow cables to that capacitor.’
‘And?’
‘Well, sir, the ship, everything on board, and everything else for a couple of light seconds around it will be annihilated. Now set that output level to maximum. And shut off that emergency override.’
‘Is a light second like a light year?’
‘The principal is the same, although it’s a little less far.’
‘Cool. You learn something every day. Er… you appreciate you’ll be destroyed, Pad?’
‘Well. Once you press that red button, sir, the one that’s flashing there, then the ship will be destroyed in a chain reaction. It will start at the emitter at the front of the ship, then work its way back.’
Fitz took a deep breath. ‘But the Onihrs will be stopped, the Earth will be saved, and there would be nothing they could do about it?’
‘Not in the seven seconds the destruction of the ship would take, sir, no.’
Fitz pressed the button.
Pad squealed.
‘Take it like a man,’ Fitz suggested, a little weakly. He could hear the ship throwing itself apart. It sounded like the biggest china tea service in the world hitting the floor. Fitz was proud he’d come up with such a great simile under such pressure. It proved he was –
‘Sir, I was rather hoping you’d use my teleport function to get us off the ship.’
The sound was deafening now. ‘You can do that?’
‘SIR!!!!!’
‘Teleport now!’ Fitz screamed, as the ship exploded around him.
* * *
Fitz appeared in what looked like an aircraft hangar. It was a bit chilly. And dark. But he felt like he was full of helium after several days on the Onihr ship, with its intense gravity.
He jumped up and down, enjoying his new‐found freedom of movement.
‘Well done,’ Pad squeaked happily. ‘I look forward to serving you again, sir.’
‘I’m alive! I’m alive!’ Fitz shouted, leaping for joy.
Anji grabbed his T-shirt and pulled him down, just as a streak of fire blew Pad out of his hand and smashed it against the back wall of the hangar.
The Doctor and Anji were squatting behind some oil drums.
‘Hi,’ Fitz said quietly.
‘Where have you been?’ Anji asked.
‘Hey, I just saved the Earth from a race of invincible would‐be time‐travelling space rhinos.’
The Doctor smiled. ‘In all of the history of the English language, I doubt that sentence has ever been spoken before. Well done. For the last few minutes, it’s been nothing but “Doctor, help!”, “Doctor, look out!”, “Doctor, they’ve got us pinned down”, “We’re not going to make it”. I’d begun to think I would never hear an original sentiment expressed again.’
Anji glared at the Doctor. ‘Believe me, Doctor, I’ve thought of some great new words in the last couple of minutes. Swearwords, designed for unique circumstances like this, that ordinary swearing just doesn’t cater for. Just before Fitz arrived, I was just thinking that you were a completely useless otterfuc–’
Another barrel exploded, drowning out Anji and showering them all in shrapnel.
‘Who’s the guy with the gun?’ Fitz asked.
‘Baskerville. He’s a Russian arms dealer who’s stolen a time machine.’
Fitz shrugged.
‘A shrug?’ Anji said, exasperated. ‘Is that the best you can manage?’
‘Look, I’ve just spent three days in space with a bunch of super‐intelligent alien rhinos on a spaceship the size of Manhattan. This is normal by comparison. By the way, here’s your phone back.’
Anji