Dolores Claiborne - Stephen King [14]
I was still crying when I fell off to sleep, because the idear of quittin-of her gettin the best of me-made me feel worse'n ever, but when I woke up, I felt good. I guess it's true how a person's mind doesn't go to sleep even if a person thinks it does; it just goes on thinkin,-and sometimes it does an even better job when the person in charge isn't there to frig it up with the usual run of chatter that goes on in a body's head-chores to do, what to have for lunch, what to watch on TV, things like that. It must be true, because the reason I felt so good was that I woke up knowin how she was foolin me. The only reason I hadn't seen it before was because I was apt to underestimate her-ayuh, even me, and I knew how sly she could be from time to time. And once I understood the trick, I knew what to do about it.
It hurt me to know I'd have to trust one of the Thursday girls to vacuum the Aubusson-and the idear of Shawna Wyndham doin it gave me what my grampa used to call the shiverin hits. You know how gormy she is, Andy-all the Wyndhams are gormy, accourse, but she's got the rest of em beat seven ways to downtown. It's like she grows bumps right out of her body to knock things over with when she goes by em. It ain't her fault, it's somethin in the blood, but I couldn't bear thinkin of Shawna chargin around in the parlor, with all of Vera's carnival glass and Tiffany just beggin to be knocked over.
Still, I had to do somethin-fool me twice, shame on me-and luckily there was Susy to fall back on. She wa'ant no ballerina, but it was her vacuumed the Aubusson for the next year, and she never broke a thing. She's a good girl, Frank, and I can't tell you how glad I was to get that weddin announcement from her, even if the fella was from away. How are they doin? What do you hear?
Well, that's fine. Fine. I'm glad for her. I don't s'pose she's got a bun in the oven yet, does she? These days it seems like folks wait until they're almost ready for the old folks home before they-Yes, Andy, I will! I just wish you'd remember it's my life I'm talkin about here-my goddam life! So why don't you just flop back in that big old chair of yours and put your feet up and relax? If you keep pushin that way, you're gonna give y'self a rupture.
Anyway, Frank, you give her my best, and tell her she just about saved Dolores Claiborne's life in the summer of 91. You c'n give her the inside story about the Thursday shitstorms n how I stopped em. I never told em exactly what was goin on; all they knew for sure was that I was buttin heads with Her Royal Majesty. I see now I was ashamed to tell em what was goin on. I guess I don't like gettin beat any more than Vera did.
It was the sound of the vacuum, you see. That was what I realized when I woke up that mornin. I told you there was nothin wrong with her ears, and it was the sound of the vacuum that told her if I was really doin the parlor or standin at the foot of the stairs, on my mark. When a vacuum cleaner is sittin in one spot, it only makes one sound, you see. Just zooooooo, like that. But when you're vacuumin a rug, it makes two sounds, and they go up and down in waves. WHOOP, that's when you push it out. And zoop, that's when you pull it back to you for another stroke. WHOOP-zoo p, WHOOP-zoo p, WHOOP-zoop.
Quit scratchin your head, you two, and look at the smile Nancy's wearn. All a body'd have to do to know which of you has spent some time runnin a vacuum cleaner is look at your faces. If you really feel like it's that important, Andy, try it for yourself. You'll hear it right off, though I imagine Maria'd just about drop dead