Don't Say a Word - Barbara Freethy [42]
"I'd like to be, but I haven't been anywhere yet." She played with her hands, twisting the diamond engagement ring on her third finger.
He wondered again where her fianc? was and why he wasn't getting involved in her search for the truth. Not that Alex wanted him involved, but it seemed odd.
"I'm an armchair traveler," Julia continued. "I let the music sweep me around the world. But one day I'd like to go in person."
"What's stopping you from going right now?"
She shrugged. "I have responsibilities. Or I did, anyway. Every time I thought about going somewhere, there was always a reason why I couldn't. Especially during the last two years," she added. "My mom was sick for a long time. 1 didn't want to go far."
"And now?" he pressed her. "Do you have big honeymoon plans?"
"We haven't gotten that far, but Michael doesn't really like to travel. He's a homebody."
"He doesn't know what he's missing. There are places on this earth that you should definitely see."
"Like where?" she asked eagerly, leaning forward, her blue eyes lighting up with interest. "Tell me about some incredible place that you've been."
He thought for a moment. "The Iguazii Falls in South America are spectacular. They border Argentina, Brazil, and Paraguay. The power and the roar of the water thunders through your body. It feels like the earth is opening up." He saw the falls in his mind, but his memory didn't do them justice. His camera hadn't been able to capture their beauty, either. Maybe some things couldn't be frozen in time.
"They sound amazing," Julia said. "Where do you go next, Alex? Do you know?"
"Not yet. I just got back from a six-week trip through South America. It was long and hot, not to mention painfully sickening in…" His voice trailed away as he realized how much he was sharing with her. The more involved they got, the more complicated everything would become. And he preferred to keep his relationships simple.
"What do you mean, painfully sickening?" she asked, obviously not willing to let the conversation go. "I don't want to talk about it." "You can't just stop in the middle of a sentence." "Sure I can. It's not pretty, Julia. It's not something a woman like you needs to hear about."
She stiffened at that. "What do you mean, a woman like me?"
"Beautiful, innocent, untouched by the grim reality of life."
"You're wrong, Alex. I just faced a very grim reality. I watched my mother die. Don't talk to me about being untouched by terrible pain."
"I'm sorry." He paused. "It's just that the poverty and violence some people in the world endure are beyond inhumane. Lately, I've begun to wonder what the hell good I'm doing taking someone's picture right before their head gets blown off."
He saw her shock and was glad. Maybe now she'd let the subject drop.
She didn't. "Did that really happen to you?" she asked quietly.
"Yes."
"When?"
"Last year."
"How did you deal with it?" she asked.
He had a hard time resisting the compassion in her eyes, and for the first time ever he found himself wanting to tell someone about one of the worst hours of his life. "I tell myself that at least I got the picture. At least her story will be told. Her death won't be hidden away like so many others, because I was there. Hell of a rationalization, but it keeps me sane."
She stared at him for a long moment, and he sensed she was reading his mind or maybe his heart. "But it doesn't make the pain go away, does it? Who was she?"
"Just a woman who wanted my help." He drew in a long, shaky breath as memories of that night filled his head. "Her eyes were black as midnight and absolutely terrified. She knew her husband was coming after her. He'd accused her of committing adultery. But she'd been raped by a man in the village." Alex shook his head, wanting to rid himself of the image that was printed indelibly on his brain. "I should have done something.