Dragons of Winter Night - Margaret Weis [173]
“Coming?” she asked Tas, thinking suddenly that the kender had been awfully quiet. “A messenger’s arrived from Palanthas!”
“I guess,” Tas said without interest.
Laurana frowned, hoping he wasn’t growing weak from lack of food. But Tas shook his head at her concern.
“I’m all right,” he mumbled. “Just this stupid gray air.”
Laurana forgot about him as she hurried down the stairs.
“News?” she asked Sturm, who peered over the walls in a vain effort to see out onto the field of battle. “I saw the messenger—”
“Oh, yes.” He smiled wearily. “Good news, I suppose. The road to Palanthas is open. The snow melted enough to get through. I have a rider standing by to take a message to Palanthas in case we are def—” He stopped abruptly, then drew a deep breath. “I want you to be ready to go back to Palanthas with him.”
Laurana had been expecting this and her answer was prepared. But now that the time had come for her speech, she could not give it. The bitter air dried her mouth, her tongue seemed swollen. No, that wasn’t it, she chided herself. She was frightened. Admit it. She wanted to go back to Palanthas! She wanted to get out of this grim place where death lurked in the shadows. Clenching her fist, she beat her gloved hand nervously on the stone, gathering her courage.
“I’m staying here, Sturm,” she said. After pausing to get her voice under control, she continued, “I know what you’re going to say, so listen to me first. You’re going to need all the skilled fighters you can get. You know my worth.”
Sturm nodded. What she said was true. There were few in his command more accurate with a bow. She was a trained swordsman, as well. She was battle-tested—something he couldn’t say about many of the young knights under his command. So he nodded in agreement. He meant to send her away anyhow.
“I am the only one trained to use the dragonlance—”
“Flint’s been trained,” Sturm interrupted quietly.
Laurana fixed the dwarf with a penetrating stare.
Caught between two people he loved and admired, Flint flushed and cleared his throat. “That’s true,” he said huskily, “but—uh—I—must admit—er, Sturm, that I am a bit short.”
“We’ve seen no sign of dragons, anyhow,” Sturm said as Laurana flashed him a triumphant glance. “The reports say they’re south of us, fighting for control of Thelgaard.”
“But you believe the dragons are on the way, don’t you?” Laurana returned.
Sturm appeared uncomfortable. “Perhaps,” he muttered.
“You can’t lie, Sturm, so don’t start now. I’m staying. It’s what Tanis would do—”
“Damn it, Laurana!” Sturm said, his face flushed. “Live your own life! You can’t be Tanis! I can’t be Tanis! He isn’t here! We’ve got to face that!” The knight turned away suddenly. “He isn’t here,” he repeated harshly.
Flint sighed, glancing sorrowfully at Laurana. No one noticed Tasslehoff, who sat huddled miserably in a corner.
Laurana put her arm around Sturm. “I know I’m not the friend Tanis is to you, Sturm. I can never take his place. But I’ll do my best to help you. That’s what I meant. You don’t have to treat me any differently from your knights—”
“I know, Laurana,” Sturm said. Putting his arm around her, he held her close. “I’m sorry I snapped at you.” Sturm sighed. “And you know why I must send you away. Tanis would never forgive me if anything happened to you.”
“Yes, he would,” Laurana answered softly. “He would understand. He told me once that there comes a time when you’ve got to risk your life for something that means more than life itself. Don’t you see, Sturm? If I fled to safety, leaving my friends behind, he would say he understood. But, deep inside, he wouldn’t. Because it is so far from what he would do himself. Besides”—she smiled—“even if there were no Tanis in this world, I still could not leave my friends.”
Sturm looked into her eyes and saw that no words of his would make any difference. Silently, he held her close. His