East Lynne [170]
excitement. She did not pray to die, but she did wish that death might come to her.
What would have been the ending, it is impossible to say, but a strange turn in affairs came; one of those wonderful coincidences sometimes, but not often to be met with. Mrs. Crosby appeared in Madame Vine's room after breakfast, and gave her an account of Helena's projected marriage. She then apologized, the real object of her visit, for dispensing so summarily with madame's services, but had reason to hope that she could introduce her to another situation. Would madame have any objection to take one in England? Madame was upon the point of replying that she should not choose to enter one in England, when Mrs. Crosby stopped her, saying that she would call in Mrs. Latimer, who could tell her about it better than she could.
Mrs. Latimer came in, all eagerness and volubility. "Ah, my dear madame," she exclaimed, "you would be fortunate indeed if you were to get into this family. The nicest people they are; he so liked and respected; she so pretty and engaging. A most desirable situation, too, treated as a lady, and all things comfortable. There's only one pupil, a girl; one of the little boys, I believe, goes in for an hour or two, but that's not much; and the salary's seventy guineas. They are friends of mine; the Carlyles; such a beautiful place they live at--East Lynne."
The Carlyles! East Lynne! Go governess there? Lady Isabel's breath was taken away.
"They are parting with their governess," continued Mrs. Latimer, "and when I was there, a day or two before I started on my tour to Germany, Mrs. Carlyle said to me, 'I suppose you could not pick us up a desirable governess for Lucy; one who is mistress of French and German.' She spoke in a half joking tone, but I feel sure that were I to write word I /had/ found one desirable, it would give her pleasure. Now, Mrs. Crosby tells me your French is quite that of a native, Madame Vine, that you read and speak German well, and that your musical abilities are excellent. I think you would be just the one to suit; and I have no doubt I could get you the situation. What do you say?"
What could she say? Her brain was in a whirl.
"I am anxious to find you one if I can," put in Mrs. Crosby. "We have been much pleased with you, and I should like you to be desirably placed. As Mrs. Latimer is so kind as to interest herself, it appears to me an opportunity that should not be missed."
"Shall I write to Mrs. Carlyle?" rejoined Mrs. Latimer.
Lady Isabel roused herself, and so far cleared her intellect as to understand and answer the question. "Perhaps you would kindly give me until to-morrow morning to consider on it? I had not intended to take a situation in England."
A battle she had with herself that day. At one moment it seemed to her that Providence must have placed this opportunity in her way that she might see her children, in her desperate longing; at another, a voice appeared to whisper that it was a wily, dangerous temptation flung across her path, one which it was her duty to resist and flee from. Then came another phase of the picture--how should she bear to see Mr. Carlyle the husband of another--to live in the same house with them, to witness his attentions, possibly his caresses? It might be difficult; but she could force and school her heart to endurance. Had she not resolved, in her first bitter repentance, /to take up her cross/ daily, and bear it? No, her own feelings, let them be wrung as they would, should not prove the obstacle.
Evening came, and she had not decided. She passed another night of pain, of restlessness, of longing for her children; this intense longing appeared to be overmastering all her powers of mind and body. The temptation at length proved too strong; the project having been placed before her covetous eyes could not be relinquished, and she finally consented to go. "What is it that would keep me away?" she argued. "The dread of discovery? Well if that comes it must; they could not hang me or kill me. Deeper humiliation than ever would
What would have been the ending, it is impossible to say, but a strange turn in affairs came; one of those wonderful coincidences sometimes, but not often to be met with. Mrs. Crosby appeared in Madame Vine's room after breakfast, and gave her an account of Helena's projected marriage. She then apologized, the real object of her visit, for dispensing so summarily with madame's services, but had reason to hope that she could introduce her to another situation. Would madame have any objection to take one in England? Madame was upon the point of replying that she should not choose to enter one in England, when Mrs. Crosby stopped her, saying that she would call in Mrs. Latimer, who could tell her about it better than she could.
Mrs. Latimer came in, all eagerness and volubility. "Ah, my dear madame," she exclaimed, "you would be fortunate indeed if you were to get into this family. The nicest people they are; he so liked and respected; she so pretty and engaging. A most desirable situation, too, treated as a lady, and all things comfortable. There's only one pupil, a girl; one of the little boys, I believe, goes in for an hour or two, but that's not much; and the salary's seventy guineas. They are friends of mine; the Carlyles; such a beautiful place they live at--East Lynne."
The Carlyles! East Lynne! Go governess there? Lady Isabel's breath was taken away.
"They are parting with their governess," continued Mrs. Latimer, "and when I was there, a day or two before I started on my tour to Germany, Mrs. Carlyle said to me, 'I suppose you could not pick us up a desirable governess for Lucy; one who is mistress of French and German.' She spoke in a half joking tone, but I feel sure that were I to write word I /had/ found one desirable, it would give her pleasure. Now, Mrs. Crosby tells me your French is quite that of a native, Madame Vine, that you read and speak German well, and that your musical abilities are excellent. I think you would be just the one to suit; and I have no doubt I could get you the situation. What do you say?"
What could she say? Her brain was in a whirl.
"I am anxious to find you one if I can," put in Mrs. Crosby. "We have been much pleased with you, and I should like you to be desirably placed. As Mrs. Latimer is so kind as to interest herself, it appears to me an opportunity that should not be missed."
"Shall I write to Mrs. Carlyle?" rejoined Mrs. Latimer.
Lady Isabel roused herself, and so far cleared her intellect as to understand and answer the question. "Perhaps you would kindly give me until to-morrow morning to consider on it? I had not intended to take a situation in England."
A battle she had with herself that day. At one moment it seemed to her that Providence must have placed this opportunity in her way that she might see her children, in her desperate longing; at another, a voice appeared to whisper that it was a wily, dangerous temptation flung across her path, one which it was her duty to resist and flee from. Then came another phase of the picture--how should she bear to see Mr. Carlyle the husband of another--to live in the same house with them, to witness his attentions, possibly his caresses? It might be difficult; but she could force and school her heart to endurance. Had she not resolved, in her first bitter repentance, /to take up her cross/ daily, and bear it? No, her own feelings, let them be wrung as they would, should not prove the obstacle.
Evening came, and she had not decided. She passed another night of pain, of restlessness, of longing for her children; this intense longing appeared to be overmastering all her powers of mind and body. The temptation at length proved too strong; the project having been placed before her covetous eyes could not be relinquished, and she finally consented to go. "What is it that would keep me away?" she argued. "The dread of discovery? Well if that comes it must; they could not hang me or kill me. Deeper humiliation than ever would