Eclipse - Stephenie Meyer [61]
“Wow.”
“And . . . most importantly . . . I’m not willing to let this drive a wedge between us.”
I rested my head against his chest and closed my eyes, totally content.
“So,” he murmured in a casual tone. “Did you make plans to go back to La Push again soon?”
I didn’t answer. His question brought back the memory of Jacob’s words, and my throat was suddenly tight.
He misread my silence and the tension in my body.
“Just so that I can make my own plans,” he explained quickly. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to hurry back because I’m sitting around waiting for you.”
“No,” I said in a voice that sounded strange to me. “I don’t have plans to go back.”
“Oh. You don’t have to do that for me.”
“I don’t think I’m welcome anymore,” I whispered.
“Did you run over someone’s cat?” he asked lightly. I knew he didn’t want to force the story out of me, but I could hear the curiosity burning behind his words.
“No.” I took a deep breath, and then mumbled quickly through the explanation. “I thought Jacob would have realized . . . I didn’t think it would surprise him.”
Edward waited while I hesitated.
“He wasn’t expecting . . . that it was so soon.”
“Ah,” Edward said quietly.
“He said he’d rather see me dead.” My voice broke on the last word.
Edward was too still for a moment, controlling whatever reaction he didn’t want me to see.
Then he crushed me gently to his chest. “I’m so sorry.”
“I thought you’d be glad,” I whispered.
“Glad over something that’s hurt you?” he murmured into my hair. “I don’t think so, Bella.”
I sighed and relaxed, fitting myself to the stone shape of him. But he was motionless again, tense.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“It’s nothing.”
“You can tell me.”
He paused for a minute. “It might make you angry.”
“I still want to know.”
He sighed. “I could quite literally kill him for saying that to you. I want to.”
I laughed halfheartedly. “I guess it’s a good thing you’ve got so much self-control.”
“I could slip.” His tone was thoughtful.
“If you’re going to have a lapse in control, I can think of a better place for it.” I reached for his face, trying to pull myself up to kiss him. His arms held me tighter, restraining.
He sighed. “Must I always be the responsible one?”
I grinned in the darkness. “No. Let me be in charge of responsibility for a few minutes . . . or hours.”
“Goodnight, Bella.”
“Wait — there was something else I wanted to ask you about.”
“What’s that?”
“I was talking to Rosalie last night. . . .”
His body tensed again. “Yes. She was thinking about that when I got in. She gave you quite a lot to consider, didn’t she?”
His voice was anxious, and I realized that he thought I wanted to talk about the reasons Rosalie’d given me for staying human. But I was interested in something much more pressing.
“She told me a little bit . . . about the time your family lived in Denali.”
There was a short pause; this beginning took him by surprise. “Yes?”
“She mentioned something about a bunch of female vampires . . . and you.”
He didn’t answer, though I waited for a long moment.
“Don’t worry,” I said, after the silence had grown uncomfortable. “She told me you didn’t . . . show any preference. But I was just wondering, you know, if any of them had. Shown a preference for you, I mean.”
Again he said nothing.
“Which one?” I asked, trying to keep my voice casual, and not quite managing. “Or was there more than one?”
No answer. I wished I could see his face, so I could try to guess what this silence meant.
“Alice will tell me,” I said. “I’ll go ask her right now.”
His arms tightened; I was unable to squirm even an inch away.
“It’s late,” he said. His voice had a little edge to it that was something new. Sort of nervous, maybe a little embarrassed. “Besides, I think Alice stepped out. . . .”
“It’s bad,” I guessed. “It’s really bad, isn’t it?” I started to panic, my heart accelerating as I imagined the gorgeous immortal rival I’d never realized I had.
“Calm down, Bella,” he said, kissing the tip of my nose. “You’re being absurd.”
“Am I? Then why won’t you tell me?”
“Because