Eona - Alison Goodman [73]
“Yes,” he hissed. “It would have had more honor than living like a dog, waiting for your next kick.”
His truth hung between us, heavy and impassable..
He closed his eyes and took a deep, pained breath. “My lady, please.” His touch on my shoulder was a plea. “I had her hand in mine and I let go. The water was too strong. She will think I abandoned her.”
I looked away from the anguish in Ryko’s face. I felt guilt every day, thirty-six times over. Perhaps I could spare him the guilt of failing Dela.
“All right,” I said. “I will ask him.”
I heard Kygo’s voice before we reached the strategy chamber. The cave was made up of three small, linked caverns, and Ryko and I were passing through the second when the emperor’s clear tones reached us.
“Is this a total of our numbers, Viktor? There are no others?”
My heartbeat quickened. For all of my reliving of our kiss and imaginings of his body against mine, I had not considered what might happen the next time I saw him. Would there still be the same heat in his eyes? Should I act as if nothing had happened? We were obviously not going to be alone. A blessing, perhaps, although something akin to disappointment settled deep within me as well.
I smoothed the front of the gown over my chest. As Madina had said, it was not as low-cut as Vida’s dress. Still, its round neckline showed the curve of my breasts, and the clinging waist needed no sash to accentuate my shape. My hands found the tightly clubbed braids that swung from the topknot at my crown. I flicked the two thick braids to the left, but decided it would look contrived and pushed them to the back again. Madina had said the manly style looked well on me, but there had been no mirror, and the reflection in the cave pool was too dark for detail.
“My lady, please wait,” Ryko whispered.
He stepped up to the natural archway that defined the entrance to the third chamber. The first two caverns had been extravagantly lit by oil lamps set only an arm’s width apart—but their glow paled in comparison to what came from the strategy chamber. It was almost like daylight.
“Lady Eona—Imperial Naiso and Mirror Dragoneye—approaches,” Ryko called.
For a moment, his formal announcement held me still. It belonged to the court, not here, in a cave. Ryko was pressing home my rank.
As I entered, five men turned from their examination of a scroll spread across a table—Yuso and Viktor among them—and dropped to their knees in low bows. The sixth man remained bent over the scroll: the emperor.
He had bathed and shaved, although he had left the dark stubble on his head. The long imperial queue had also been washed and re-clubbed, but without the jewels and gold thread strung through it. No doubt they would soon be our army’s food and weapons. His only jewel now was the Imperial Pearl, framed by the open collar of his borrowed red tunic: a very visible symbol of his right to command.
His skin still held the pallor of the shadow world, and his body had the careful bearing of pain, but overall he had recovered well. Slowly, he looked up, and my breath locked in my chest. His dark eyes held no warmth, only wariness.
“Do you no longer bow to your emperor, Lady Eona?” he asked.
I dropped into my own obeisance, hiding my confusion. Had I done something wrong? I stared fiercely at the woven rug on the cave floor, willing back the sharp sting of tears. There could be only one reason for his coldness. My passion had disgusted him.
“Rise,” he said to us all.
I climbed to my feet, hoping the flush had faded from my face. The bank of oil lamps around the walls made the room airless, or perhaps it was my own shame that choked my breath. I pressed my hand against my chest, covering the pale skin above the deep blue cloth.
Ryko edged into the periphery of my vision—a silent reminder. I did not want to step forward, but I had promised.
“Your Majesty,” I said, trying to add some steel to my voice. “Ryko wishes to join a search party and be of use. May he have your leave to do so?”
I was not ready to meet the ice in Kygo’s eyes