Eternally Yours - Brenda Jackson [80]
Syneda knew she had avoided the truth long enough and it was time to be honest with herself. She did love Clayton. She probably had always loved him. But even with that admission, she knew she would continue to fight her love for him. Her survival depended on it. As a child, her heart had not just been broken, it had been crushed. And it couldn’t survive being crushed again. She couldn’t take the chance.
No matter how much she loved him, she couldn’t risk having her heart destroyed. She just couldn’t.
Chapter 19
Justin Madaris pounded on the door a good five minutes before it finally opened.
Clayton scowled at Justin and then at Dex before rubbing a hand across his eyes that were clouded with sleep. “What are the two of you doing here? And what are you doing in Houston, Justin?”
Justin studied his youngest brother with an intensity that came from being the oldest and always having to look out for his younger siblings. He knew immediately that something was wrong. A quick glance at Dex indicated that he had picked up on it, as well. Clayton’s robe looked rumpled and his ungroomed appearance made him look a little rough around the edges. His face had the look of a man who’d had a bad night. In fact, he looked as if he’d had quite a few bad nights. “What are you still doing in bed, Clayton? It’s almost two in the afternoon.”
Swearing, Clayton rubbed the top of his head and stepped aside to let his brothers in. “Maybe I wanted to sleep late.”
“Clayton, you don’t know how to sleep late,” Dex said with a half smile on his lips.
Clayton glared at Dex. “Just what is this? Gang up on Clayton day?”
Dex shrugged as he sat down on the sofa. He glanced around the room. “This place is a mess. I never knew you could be so sloppy.”
“So now you know,” Clayton said, moving through the untidy living room and sitting in a chair. Dex was right. His place was a mess and it wasn’t like him to be sloppy. If anything, he was known to be extremely neat. He hated disorder of any kind. But now he didn’t care. Lately he hadn’t cared much about anything.
Clayton gave Dex a hard glare. “For a man who makes a living playing in dirt, I hardly think you have room to talk. The biggest mistake Mom ever made was buying you that sandbox for your fourth birthday.”
“Kids, behave,” Justin said, chuckling.
Clayton’s response was a grunt. “You never did answer me, Justin. What are you doing in Houston?”
Justin dropped in the chair across from Clayton. “And you never answered me. Why are you still in bed?”
“You go first since you’re the oldest.”
Justin grinned and then conceded. “I drove Lorren down for Caitlin’s baby shower. Did you forget it was this weekend?”
“Yeah, I forgot,” Clayton said, and felt annoyed that he had forgotten. During the past few weeks, his mind had been preoccupied with other things.
“So why are you still in bed?”
Clayton rose and went into the kitchen. Dex and Justin followed him. Ignoring them, he switched on the coffeemaker.
“We’re not going away, Clayton.”
Clayton turned to his brothers. “I can see that,” he said, glaring at them, frowning. “The reason I was still in bed is because I had no reason to rush getting up this morning,” he finally said, simply.
“I’m surprised to hear you say that, considering the fact that Syneda flew in for the baby shower today.”
Clayton’s eyes became hard like volcanic rocks. “That’s all the more reason,” he said coolly. “She’s the last person I want to see.”
Dex looked at his brother,