Evermore - Alyson Noel [91]
“Only love heals. Anger, guilt, and fear can only destroy and separate you from your true capabilities.” He nods, his eyes grazing over me.
“And that’s another thing.” I glare at him. “Your ability to read my mind, when I can’t read yours. It’s not fair.”
He laughs. “Do you really want to read my mind? I thought my air of mystery was one of the things you liked about me?”
I gaze down at my knees, my cheeks burning as I think of all the embarrassing thoughts he’s been privy to.
“There are ways to shield yourself, you know. Maybe you should go see Ava.”
“You know Ava?” I gape, feeling suddenly ganged up on.
He shakes his head. “My only connection to Ava is through you, your thoughts about Ava.”
I look away, watching a family of bunnies hop by, then back at him. “So the racetrack?”
“Premonition, you did it too.”
“What about the race you lost?”
He laughs. “I have to lose a few, otherwise people tend to get suspicious. But I certainly made up for it, don’t you think?”
“And the tulips?”
He smiles. “Manifesting. Same way you made the elephant, and this beach. It’s simple quantum physics. Consciousness brings matter into being where there was once merely energy. Not nearly as difficult as people choose to think.”
I squint, not really getting it. No mater how simple he thinks it is.
“We create our own reality. And yes you can do it at home,” he says, anticipating my next question, the one that just formed in my head. “In fact, you already do, you’re just not aware of it because it takes so much longer.”
“It doesn’t take longer for you.”
He laughs. “I’ve been around awhile, plenty of time to learn a few tricks.”
“How long?” I ask, gazing at him, remembering that room in his house and wondering exactly what I’m dealing with.
He sighs and looks away. “Very long.”
“And now I’ll live forever too?”
“That’s up to you.” He shrugs. “You don’t have to do any of this. You can simply put the whole thing out of your mind and go on with your life. Choosing to let go when the time is right. I only provided the ability, but the choice is still yours.”
I stare out at the ocean, its sparkling waters so brilliant, so beautiful, I can hardly believe it exists because of me. And even though it’s fun to play with such powerful magic, my thoughts soon turn to darker things. “I need to know what happened with Haven. That day I caught you . . .” I grimace at the memory. “And what about Drina? She’s immortal too, right? Did you make her that way? And how did this even begin? How did you become immortal in the first place? How does such a thing even happen? Did you know she killed Evangeline, and almost killed Haven too? And what’s up with your creepy room?”
“Can you repeat the question?” He laughs.
“Oh, and another thing, what the heck did Drina mean when she said she’s killed me over and over again?”
“Drina said that?” His eyes go wide as his face drains of color.
“Yeah.” I nod, remembering her smug and haughty face as she broke the news. “She was all, ‘Here we go again, stupid mortal, you always fall for this game, blah blah blah.’ I thought you were watching, I thought you saw the whole thing?”
He shakes his head, mumbling. “I didn’t see the whole thing, I tuned in late. Oh God, Ever, it’s all my fault, all of it. I should’ve known, I should’ve never gotten you involved, I should’ve left you alone—”
“She also said she saw you in New York. Or at least she told Haven that.”
“She lied,” he mumbles. “I didn’t go to New York.” And when he looks at me his eyes are etched with such pain, I reach for his hand and hold it in mine. Shaken by how sad and vulnerable he looks and wanting only to erase it. I press my lips against his warm waiting mouth, hoping to convey that whatever it is, there’s a pretty good chance I’ll forgive him.
“The kiss gets sweeter with every incarnation.” He