Faith - Lesley Pearse [114]
She knew Stuart thought a casino was the equivalent of the gateway to hell, and that he didn’t like the idea of her being out at night in the company of other men, but he accepted her decision with resignation. He almost certainly expected that she would soon get tired of it, but perhaps the reason he didn’t make more objections was because he knew they really did need the money.
Yet from the first night Laura loved working at the casino. There was something about the Art Deco building, the soft lighting, plush decor, sophistication and the buzz of excitement in the air that made her spirits rise as soon as she walked in the door. It was some way from the town centre so she had no problem parking her car. She loved being able to dress up in the smart clothes she hadn’t worn since she left London, to be Laura again, not Barney’s mother or Stuart’s lady. She mixed with interesting people who stimulated her mind and she felt good about herself.
Stuart often joked that it was like having a mistress when she came out of the bedroom looking glamorous, and if he minded being left alone with Barney, he kept it to himself. Just a few weeks in to her starting at the casino, he got work again, and she’d be rushing out just as he got in, leaving him instructions about Barney, and his dinner that she’d left in the oven.
Two nights at the casino went up to three, and still Stuart didn’t complain, even though she often hadn’t got his dinner ready for him when he came home, and sometimes hadn’t even given Barney his. Yet on balance they were far happier that summer, they had lots to talk about, they could afford to go out for the day on Sundays, and Laura was much more enthusiastic about lovemaking. But by September, when the odd extra fourth night had become a regular one, Stuart became sullen.
‘Barney misses you,’ he said one evening just as she was leaving. ‘He doesn’t settle well now, he keeps getting out of bed and asking when you are coming home.’
Laura didn’t stop to think about what he’d said, she just heard the reproach in his voice and saw it as the first stage of him becoming like all his friends and their neighbours, a man who wanted his woman right under his thumb. She’d had too much of that with Greg.
‘Well, smack him then,’ she snapped. ‘He’s only trying it on. I’m stuck at home with him all day and I need more than that in my life.’
She saw Stuart’s expression harden. ‘So neither of us is as important as a bunch of losers drooling at you over the bar?’
‘At least they see me as a woman, not just some sort of glorified housekeeper,’ she snapped, and left without even saying goodbye.
Stuart was right to some extent, she did have men drooling over her. They said her English accent was sexy, and that she was beautiful enough to be a model. She felt high on the attention, and powerful too, and although she did love Stuart just as passionately as when they first met, there were times when she regretted moving in with him.
She didn’t have the status of a wife, but she couldn’t do exactly what she wanted to do either. There were times when she was tempted to jump in her car and drive down to London to see Jackie, Meggie and Ivy, but she couldn’t, not without money of her own, or hurting Stuart’s feelings. Besides, Stuart had her car during the day to get to work. The car was often a bone of contention, for since Stuart passed his driving test he always insisted on driving it when they went out together. He said he felt like a kept man if she drove, and he didn’t seem to understand that by taking it over he was snatching the last remnants of her independence.
His mother was another thorny issue. She interfered on many levels, quizzing Laura about what she cooked for her son, and even what she put in his sandwiches. She always sniffed with disapproval about her working at the casino, and made pointed remarks about Stuart being left to babysit Barney.
But the worst thing was that she kept asking Laura when she was going to get a divorce. Laura couldn’t tell her that she was afraid to start proceedings because Greg would