Faith - Lesley Pearse [169]
‘I knew that later, but when a man wants a woman every other male is a threat.’ Ted smiled wryly. ‘Anyway, in ’77, Peggie, my wife, had a riding accident which left her paralysed from the waist down. Jackie still wasn’t living here all the time then of course, only coming up for holidays. I remember calling in on her one evening after visiting Peggie in hospital. I was very down because I didn’t know how I was going to cope when she came home and became dependent on me for everything.’
‘I expect Jackie got the whole story out of you,’ Stuart said. ‘She was always good at that.’
‘That’s exactly what happened,’ Ted replied. ‘I blurted out the whole thing – that we’d never had a good marriage and that she was so bitter and angry about the accident that I knew it was going to be hell from now on.’
‘What advice did Jackie give you?’
‘To buy a plot of land and build a bungalow suitable for a disabled person in a wheelchair. She thought that Peggie would accept her disability in a new home specially designed for her. She even offered to help me by getting in touch with people who specialized in aids for the disabled and understood what was needed. She suggested I could get a carer in during the day while I had to work which would relieve the pressure on me. That kind of sealed my friendship with Jackie because she was the only person I could admit to how scared and frantic I felt. I certainly couldn’t admit it to my son or daughter, not even to the doctor.’
‘Did you act on her advice?’
‘Yes, I did. I bought a plot of land by the golf course in St Andrews, found the best architect in Fife, and really got stuck into it. Jackie came out a few times while it was being built; she was very encouraging and supportive.’
‘Tell me, Ted, did she have a nickname for you?’ Stuart asked.
Ted smiled. ‘Yes, a ridiculous one. She called me “Growler”. Why d’you ask that?’
‘She mentioned that name to Laura. I just wanted to check it was you.’
‘I never actually met Laura,’ Ted said thoughtfully. ‘I feel I have because Jackie talked about her so often, but then I didn’t really know any of her other friends either. I know Belle and Charles Howell of course, I did the survey on Kirkmay House for them, but once Jackie and I began our affair we had to be so careful that I never called at the farm if she had anyone else there with her.’
‘So when did it start?’ Stuart asked, relieved that the man was finally getting to the point.
‘In 1980, a year before Barney was killed. I often saw the wee boy when he was staying with her. She loved him like he was her own. I called round one afternoon and she was crying because she was worried that Laura was neglecting him. I gave her a cuddle and it just flared up.’
Ted closed his eyes for a moment. He often relived the events of that afternoon for it was the most astounding, wonderful and thrilling day of his whole life.
The front door of the farmhouse was open because it was a warm, sunny day in May. He called out to Jackie and she called back to ask him to come in. She was on her knees cleaning out a kitchen cupboard, and when she looked round he saw she was crying.
He instinctively knew the cause of it was Barney, for she often became choked up when she spoke of him. But this was the first time he’d actually seen her cry about anything.
When Peggie cried her face became red and puffy, her mouth wobbled and she looked ugly. But Jackie looked beautiful. She was wearing a faded denim dress with studs down the front, her legs were bare, and her hair was tied up in a ponytail, making her look closer to her early twenties than her real age of thirty-seven. Her complexion was flushed but only delicately so, and the tears were trickling down her cheeks like dew drops.
He went over to her and lifted her up, embracing her tightly. ‘Don’t cry, you’ll see him again soon,’ was all he said.
He didn’t actually mean to kiss her lips, he wasn’t bold enough for that. But suddenly her mouth was on his and she was kissing him. It must have been ten or twelve years since