Five Flavors of Dumb - Antony John [44]
As they all cranked away over the next hour, I didn’t spend my time checking MySpace hits, or trawling Google, or even posting anonymous comments to hard rock fan sites about this incredible new band I’d heard called Dumb. Instead I watched with amazement as Dumb pulled “Kiss Me Like You Mean It” into something resembling a song through Josh’s enthusiasm, Ed’s discipline, and Finn’s ever-patient guidance. My brother Finn, the wayward freshman, had serious skills, and was sharing them with my band. I wondered if I’d have done the same for him.
I should have known better than to push my luck, but there were a few minutes left and everyone was pumped up, so I convinced Dumb to attempt a full performance. They seemed so close to getting through it too, but then Kallie stopped playing and the band fizzled out around her.
“Sorry,” she said. “I’ll get it this time.”
Again the band struck up, and again they were in the middle of what I assumed must be the chorus when Kallie dropped out, staring accusingly at her fingers. Finn leaned forward and moved her fingers to the right place, but by then Tash had clearly had enough.
“Just leave that chord out,” she snapped.
Kallie peered around Finn. “No. I need to learn it.”
“No, Kallie. You need to learn the guitar.”
I flashed back to the scene outside the radio station and decided I couldn’t let things escalate. “Leave her alone, Tash. She’s trying, okay?”
Tash pretended to stifle a laugh. “Like that’ll help.”
I was braced to continue our little spat, but Finn moved the piece of paper with the chord symbols in front of Tash, added a couple of his own, and signaled for her to play. Before she’d even had a chance to sound the first chord, Finn took her left hand and meticulously repositioned her fingers. It was a subtle gesture, but it changed the balance of power in a heartbeat. Suddenly Kallie was beaming at Finn like he was her own personal hero, while Tash stared straight ahead, struggling to work out how she’d been outmaneuvered by a freshman. A day earlier I’d have assumed it was just innocence or cluelessness on Finn’s part, but now I knew it was nothing of the sort.
By the time five o’clock rolled around, Tash already seemed to have her guitar halfway into its case. I waved my hands to indicate that I had announcements, but she just ignored me, striding toward the door like I was invisible. I could have let it go, but instead I leaped up and cut her off.
“Guess you and your brother both have a crush on Kallie, huh?” she said, throwing a backward glance at the pair.
“She’s getting better,” I replied, quietly but firmly.
“Really? And how the hell would you know?”
I felt the flash of anger that always accompanied jabs at my deafness. I wanted to tell her to get over herself, but instead I gripped her arm and pulled her into the practice room around the corner, where even more of the soundproofing seemed to have been sacrificed since my last visit with Josh.
“Why do you always do that?” I asked.
“What?”
“You know . . . those snarky remarks to piss people off. Why do you want everyone to hate you?”
Tash rolled her eyes, snorted, and shifted her weight from one leg to the other, reenacting every well-worn stereotype of the girl who doesn’t give a crap. But undermining the whole choreographed routine was her face, flushed red and tense. The girl with rings in her nose, eyebrow, and lip stared at me like she’d never before been pierced so deeply, and I stared right back. I knew that today needed to be the day that everything changed. Today needed to be the day that she blinked first, that she stormed off in a gesture of defiance that was really just surrender in disguise.
To my utter surprise, she did precisely that.
I felt exhausted as I returned to the classroom, but grateful glances from Kallie and Ed told me they knew how important it had been for me to take a stand. Josh and Will had already taken