From Darkness Won - Jill Williamson [28]
“But Mother speaks so highly of him. You truly believe he would play with your heart?”
“Not intentionally. He would be sincere at first. But it would not be long before temptation whisked him away. And even if he remained loyal and true all his days, he does not live for Arman. How can I—”
“Mother says he has met Arman.”
Vrell frowned, wishing it were so. “I cannot trust Mother’s word of late.”
“For shame, Averella! How can you say that? When has she ever deceived us?”
“Oh, you want to know…” But Vrell could not bring herself to destroy Gypsum’s good impression of Mother by telling her about Sir Eagan. “It is not your concern. Simply know that Mother will not make you marry anyone if you tell her your heart.”
“She is not making me marry anyone. She only suggested I think about it in case she is unable to change your mind. I do not think she intends to make a final decision until after this coming war.”
“Then we both have time to consider the situation.”
Gypsum picked up her needle. “I suppose. But I pray you make the right choice so I do not have to.”
5
Vrell looked down on the training fields from the top of Ryson Tower. The wind whipped her loose hair about her face as she watched the soldiers practice drills.
Achan’s shiny breastplate and Shung’s black armor made them stand out from the soldiers dressed in red. It reminded Vrell of when she used to watch her father, Duke Amal, train from this tower.
Tears flooded her eyes. The innocent memory had come so naturally. But the wave of sorrow, confusion, and guilt that followed nearly brought her to her knees.
Duke Amal, dear father he had been, was not her blood. Just as Carmine had never really been her home. Months of trying to get back, and this was the truth she now faced.
Where did she truly belong?
She swept down the spiral staircase, filled with such confusion and uncertainty. She pleaded with Arman to set it right. She knew better than to petition Him when she refused to obey. But she hoped Arman understood her heart. She barely understood it herself.
Vrell pushed through the secret door into Mother’s study and peeked out from behind the changing screen. The room was empty, so she went to the door, rang the bell, then stood at the window and looked out on the practice field again.
She had no intention of living a lie any longer. To be true to who she really was she had abandoned her birthright and sought out a place with Prince Oren and the Mârad. But he had refused her services as a healer—suggesting instead that she reconcile with her mother. As if it were that simple.
And now that Jax had refused to take her along, her last hope rested with her former fiancé, Bran Rennan. Their relationship had been strained since they had parted ways. He disliked her plan to serve the Mârad, but she hoped she could convince him to take her along to Armonguard.
She wanted—needed—to assist in this war. If she were on the battlefield, there was little chance she would run into Achan. He would be kept safe, protected by his guard. Months, maybe years, would pass before she saw him again. She hoped so, anyway, for she had promised Arman that when she did see him again, she would tell him the truth.
Bran could not refuse her. He had courted another woman while he and Vrell were engaged. That alone should indebt him a bit, should it not?
The door to Mother’s study swung inward, and Anillo entered. Mother’s steward was thin and old, but had bested men on the practice field as young as Vrell. “Yes, my lady?”
“Anillo, I require a visit with Master Rennan. Here, as soon as possible. It is an emergency.”
“Emergency, my lady?” he asked, his expression blank.
“Well… it is very important.”
“An emergency of great importance, then?”
“No, just that… Oh, well. Go on, then. That will do, thank you.”
“Of course, my lady.” Anillo bowed and left the room.
Vrell’s side ached. She wished it would heal quicker. She sat at Mother’s jade desk and let her thoughts