Gauntlet - Michael Jan Friedman [22]
“I know,” Nikolas said. “You’re surprised. Tuna casserole’s for middle-aged guys in stellar cartography.”
“Actually,” Caber began, “I—”
“Best piece of advice I ever got,” Nikolas explained, “was from an engineer on an Academy training ship. He told me replicators aren’t all alike, and the worst of them are on Constellation-class deep-space explorers like this one. The best approach when you find yourself on one of these things is to start simple and work your way up—and what’s simpler than a tuna casserole?”
“True,” said Caber, “but—”
“If you’re done discussing the finer points of replicator cuisine,” said a blond woman waiting her turn behind them, “the rest of us would like to eat.”
Nikolas frowned. “Come on,” he told Caber. “I wouldn’t want anyone to starve to death on my account.”
Caber didn’t address the woman, but neither did he seem inclined to rush. Turning to the replicator, he said, “Salmon steak. Medium rare. In béarnaise sauce.”
Nikolas didn’t get it. After he had given Caber the inside poop, he figured his roommate would go the tuna casserole route too. But something as tricky as salmon steak with béarnaise sauce? That was the exact opposite of what Nikolas would have recommended.
He saw the plate materialize in the replicator slot, its centerpiece a moist chunk of pinkish meat drenched in brown and translucent sauce. It looked good, all right—but thanks to that engineer on the Copernicus, Nikolas knew better.
There was only one explanation that he could think of. Despite appearances, Caber had allowed the woman in back of them to get him flustered. Obviously, he wasn’t as self-possessed as he looked.
Nikolas found himself taking comfort in the observation. He knew he shouldn’t, but he did.
“There’s an empty table over there,” Caber said, pointing to it with his chin.
“Sounds good,” Nikolas told him. It was only after they sat down that he leaned toward his roommate and said, “You shouldn’t have let that woman get you flummoxed.”
Caber looked at him. “Flummoxed?”
Then, to Nikolas’s surprise, Caber laughed. It was a deep, heartfelt laugh, the kind that said he hadn’t been bothered by the woman at all—that, in fact, the whole idea was rather ludicrous.
“But,” Nikolas asked, “if you weren’t bothered by her, how did you end up ordering a salmon steak? Didn’t you hear what I said about replicators on the Constellation class?”
“Sure,” said Caber. “And I’d heard the same thing. But I checked the Stargazer’s specs before I came aboard, and it’s been equipped with a different replicator system than the other Constellation-class ships. A more advanced system. It can handle a lot more than”—he glanced at Nikolas’s plate with obvious sympathy—“the simple dishes.”
Nikolas felt as if he had shot himself in the foot with a phaser rifle. The worst of it was that his roommate had tried to disabuse him of his error, but he hadn’t listened.
“You don’t say,” he got out.
Caber shrugged. “It’s only one meal. You can order the salmon for dinner if you like.”
True, Nikolas thought. But I’ll still feel like a fool.
Here he’d been thinking he had a leg up on Caber—an arena, no matter how small or insignificant, in which he could outshine the guy. I should have known better, he told himself.
Prodding halfheartedly at his casserole, Nikolas watched Caber dig into his salmon and lift a juicy-looking forkful into his mouth. “How is it?” he asked.
Caber nodded as he chewed. “Not bad,” he said after he had swallowed and wiped his mouth with his Starfleet-issue cloth napkin. “I mean it’s not the quality of the fish you get in Nova Scotia, but I’ve had a whole lot worse.”
Nikolas knew of two places with the name Nova Scotia. Having never been to either one of them, he figured he had better ask. “Nova Scotia on Earth or on Dalarte Prime?”
Caber started to laugh. Then he seemed to realize it wasn’t a joke. “There aren’t any salmon on Dalarte Prime,” he said gently. “The closest thing to it is called a second-sunset fish, and most people find it a bit too salty for their taste.”
“Nova Scotia on Earth, then,” Nikolas said,