Germinal - Emile Zola [176]
‘Blimey but it’s cold,’ he said, as he too got dressed again.
She had never known him be so nice. Usually for every kind word he spoke to her, she got two insults as well. How good it would have been to live in harmony together! In her state of exhausted lassitude she felt a warm fondness for him. She smiled and said softly:
‘Give me a kiss.’
He kissed her and lay down beside her to wait until she was ready to walk.
‘You know,’ she said, ‘you were wrong to shout at me back there, because I just couldn’t go on any more. Even at the face it’s cooler. But if you knew how baking hot it is along at the other end of the road!’
‘I know,’ he replied. ‘We’d be better off under the trees…But you, poor girl, it’s difficult for you working this section. I can see that.’
She was so touched to hear him agree that she put on a show of bravery.
‘Oh, I just had a weak turn. Anyway the air’s bad today…But you’ll soon see if I’m a sly one or not. If you’ve got to work, you’ve got to work. Isn’t that right? I’d rather die than not do my fair share.’
There was silence. He had his arm round her waist, holding her to his chest so that no harm should come to her. And while she already felt strong enough to return to the coal-face, she preferred to revel in the moment.
‘Only I wish,’ she went on very quietly, ‘that you could be kinder to me…If people can just love each other a little bit, they can be so happy.’
And she began to cry softly.
‘But I do love you,’ he protested, ‘or I wouldn’t have taken you to live with me.’
She simply nodded. Often men took women just so that they could have them for themselves, not caring a button whether they were happy or not. Her tears were flowing more hotly now as she thought with despair of the good life she could have had if she had ended up with someone else, someone who would always have had his arm round her waist like this. Someone else? And dimly she could perceive this person in the midst of her distress. But that was finished and done with now, and all she wanted was to be able to spend her life with the man she was with, just as long as he didn’t always treat her so roughly.
‘Well then,’ she said, ‘just try sometimes to be like you are now.’
Her sobbing stopped her from saying more, and he kissed her again.
‘You silly thing!…Look, I promise to be nice to you. Anyway, it’s not as if I’m any worse than the next man.’
She looked at him and began to smile again through her tears. Perhaps he was right: you didn’t come across many happy women. Then, although she only half believed his promise, she gave herself up to the joy of seeing him be nice to her. My God, if only it could have lasted! They were now in each other’s arms again; and while they were still holding each other in one long embrace, the sound of approaching footsteps brought them quickly to their feet. Three comrades who had seen them go past were coming to see if they were all right.
They all set off together. It was nearly ten o’clock, and they chose a cool spot to eat their lunch before going back to the sweltering heat at the coal-face. But just as they were finishing their sandwiches and about to take a swig of coffee from their flasks, they were alarmed by the sound of voices coming from far off in the mine. What could it be? Had there been another accident? They got to their feet and ran to find out. Hewers, putters and pit-boys were streaming past in the opposite direction, but nobody knew anything; everyone was shouting, it must be some terrible disaster. Panic was gradually beginning to spread throughout the mine, and shadowy figures emerged terrified from the roadways, their lamps bobbing into view before disappearing again into the darkness.