Growing Up Laughing_ My Story and the Story of Funny - Marlo Thomas [79]
Marlo: Oh, no.
Kathy: The Gillians laughed, Dad laughed and I giggled and thought, “Oh, my dad is the funniest person in the whole world!” It didn’t even occur to me as a little kid that he was using a curse word.
Marlo: Right.
Kathy: Nobody in the room cried. Nobody got offended. Nobody said, “How dare you!” Everybody just knew he was kidding. Of course, when my mother found out later, she said to my father, “You said what?!”
Marlo: So this is where your style of humor came from.
Kathy: Yes, it’s a very direct pipeline from my mom and dad.
Marlo: Your mom is funny, too?
Kathy: She’s funny, but she doesn’t really know it. My dad was like a comedian, my mom was more of a character. Okay, here’s an example: For my whole life, my mother has told me I’m not likeable.
Marlo: No—really?
Kathy: Really. And the way it comes out of her mouth is hysterical. She’s not saying it to be a horrible person; she’s just saying it like a director says when he’s giving you a good note. Like “You’re doing really well—we just need you to play the character a little bit more likeable.” It’s like my mom is actually directing me in life.
Chapter Four: The Town Crier
Marlo: Were there a lot of kids in your family?
Kathy: Yeah, I’m the youngest of five kids.
Marlo: And you were the one who entertained everybody, right?
Kathy: Not really. Growing up, I was more like . . . Do you know that book The Alcoholic Family? It lists all the roles family members take on—like, one person is “The Peacemaker.” Another is “The Mouse.” Another is “The Clown.”
Marlo: And you were the clown?
Kathy: No—I think I was the mouse, because I was more interested in getting people to hear whatever outrageous thing was happening, or whatever I thought was the truth. That’s what I do in my act today. So in our family, I’d say everybody was probably wittier that me. I was more like the town crier.
Marlo: When did you first get the idea that you could make people laugh? Were you the class cut-up?
Kathy: I was definitely the class cut-up—but it was the classic survivor story. I was this little, spindly, freckly, pale kid with kinky bozo hair. Completely picked on. Never in a popular group or anything.
Marlo: So getting laughs made you popular.
Kathy: It never made me popular—but it made me not get picked on anymore. I remember the specific tipping point. I was nine or ten, and the mean girls’ clique was really coming down hard on me, one girl in particular. So I made this clever joke about her, and sort of packed the joke with facts—like she’d gotten a bad score on a test, or something. And I did it in front of her girlfriends.
Marlo: And?
Kathy: And she backed off. That was kind of a big moment for me, you know? I wasn’t making them laugh to be popular. I just thought, Well, if I can keep them distracted by laughing at my jokes, then maybe they won’t be so focused on kicking my ass after school.
Chapter Five: Griffin vs. Kidman
Marlo: Your whole act is built around being on the celebrity D-List, and you really are the queen of self-deprecation. When did that start?
Kathy: That’s something from my parents, too, and I think it’s kind of an Irish-Catholic thing. There’s this kind of philosophy they all have—a strong edict about keeping everyone in their place. My mom still uses the expression “Don’t get so high and mighty.”
Marlo: Right.
Kathy: Or, “Look at herself—she thinks she’s the queen of England!” That’s the attitude I grew up around, and I just felt it was funny. I could never understand these households where the parents would say things that were, like, supportive. I thought it was hilarious when kids would say, “My parents tell me I can grow up to be whatever I want to be!” I’d just roll off my chair laughing. I’d think, Well, they’re kidding with you! You can’t be whatever you want to be! You have to be what they tell you your limitations are!
Marlo: That’s very funny.
Kathy: You know, when I was in high school, I used to tease my mom. I’d say to her, “Why didn’t you guys ever tell me that I could grow