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On several occasions, I’ve needed to go above and beyond even this. I have gone so far as to negotiate the moving of a director’s wine collection from France. In another case, we bought a manager a home and moved his daughter’s horse.

Nothing, it seems, is beyond reason as long as the employer is convinced the company needs you. Remember, though, parity is important in an organization and some of the things you request may be denied because they would shake up the organization’s existing compensation ranges and structures. If this is the case, don’t push further—the organization isn’t likely to budge and you will lose.

■ THE PSYCHOLOGY OF THE DEAL

After several go-rounds on benefits, you’ll likely be close to settling in to negotiate salary. When you think that time has come, you may want to raise the following issues as much for the opportunity to secure them as to give them away:

• Signing bonus

• Severance

• Earlier-than-scheduled compensation review

• Guaranteed minimum first-year bonus

How you deal in the final negotiations will be a telltale sign for the employer on how well you will negotiate for the company. This is especially important if you are seeking a purchasing, marketing, or sales position. You don’t want to cave, but you do want to be seen as being logical in your rationale and considerate of their position.

Throughout the negotiations, you may hear comments or questions like the following and you need to be prepared to deal with them in a logical and matter-of-fact style:

• If we make you this offer, will you accept it right now?

• What will it take for you to accept the offer?

• What other way can we structure this deal so that it would be acceptable?

• What do you think is fair-market compensation for someone like you in this city?

• How low can you go on each dimension of the compensation package?

My advice is to remain cool and stick to your agenda. An employer who is asking you these questions is trying to close you. The “psychology of the deal” dictates that you never accept an offer on the spot. If you say yes immediately, it weakens your position now and in the future. Always ask for a day to think about it even if you’re ready to sign. You may want to use phrases like:

• I’m very interested in joining your team, and I’d like the night to think it over. Is that okay with you?

• I’m very interested in joining your team, and I’d like the night to discuss the details with my spouse. Do you mind? (This is especially relevant if it requires relocation.)

Your uncommon courtesy will buy you the night—or longer—to mull over the details and ensure you haven’t missed anything.

■ BREAKING AN IMPASSE

When negotiations come to an impasse, and they always do, it’s your responsibility to continue driving the deal. Be prepared to ask questions and keep the negotiations alive and moving forward. Asking the following demonstrates your sincere interest in coming to an agreeable offer:

• What flexibility do you have on: salary, signing bonus, annual bonus, or anything else?

• How about considering other dimensions of the package, beyond annual salary and job title? For example, signing bonus, annual bonus, vacation, retirement plan, and equity.

• What other differently structured compensation packages can you offer?

■ NAVIGATING THE GAUNTLET

Most people are reluctant to negotiate because they either feel greedy or have a hard time asserting themselves. Yet, these same people are quite effective when acting on behalf of their company. Guerrilla, if this describes you, it is okay. Your remedy is at hand—do it for your family. Think what a difference an extra $5, $10, or $20,000 could make in little Timmy’s life. By negotiating for those you care about most, you’ll negotiate a better deal. It’s never just about you.

■ BODY LANGUAGE

You need to be conscious of your body language. Be aware of the messages you are sending. There are times when the negotiation can be a real grind. Don’t get rattled.