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‘He worked out who it was,’ I said. ‘You might get an abusive phone call. As I predicted he wants to kill you.’

‘So I should look at getting a bodyguard?’

‘I’m glad you can joke about it.’

‘Well, there’s not much else I can do.’

‘He’s in London right now so you’re safe for the moment, but after that no guarantees, sorry. I only hope he calms down soon. Oh and he’s demanding paternity testing. Would you consent? Sorry again. I promise I won’t hold you to anything - I mean financially, morally, babysitting - anything.’

‘If it helps. I don’t have to wank into a test tube, do I?’

‘No, I think they can achieve the same result with a simple mouth swab.’

‘Oh yeah,’ he laughed, ‘Didn’t think that through, did I? Are you really sure you have no idea?’

‘Tony was only home for one weekend in November and it happened to be that weekend - so no, I have no idea. It could have been either of you.’

‘Did anyone…how can I put this…have a numerical advantage that might tip the balance of probabilities?’

‘Ah…no.’

‘Gee, you had a busy weekend.’

‘Don’t make me more embarrassed than I already feel,’ I said, but laughed in spite of myself. ‘He was only home for one weekend that month, remember. The thing is, it’s about the timing. I mean when intercourse happened in respect to the egg being released, so to speak.’

‘So we have to have paternity testing.’

‘Or wait until I have a little brown baby or a little blonde baby, I suppose…You know, if I hadn’t lost little William I’d probably be hoping for a miscarriage right now, but having been through it once I could never wish that. I’m still terrified it’s going to happen again, anyway, to pay me back for my evil deeds.’

‘Oh don’t go getting a Catholic guilt complex on me. Worse sins have gone unpunished.’

‘I suppose so. And I’m not Catholic, fortunately. Thank you again for not yelling at me - you’re being an absolute prince. I’ve had enough abuse from Tony to last me a lifetime.’

‘I bet you have, although I still think he’s a hypocritical jerk. Anyway, I’m driving into the car park now so I’d better go. Speak later.’

I went back to bed, slept for an hour and woke with a strong compulsion to walk along a beach. A built-up city beach simply would not do either; it had to be wild and windswept. I drove all the way up along the Northern Beaches as far as Palm Beach. I got out of my car and walked up and down the entire length. The weather had worsened from the previous day; it was cold and wet, and a fierce wind whipped stinging sand across my face and hands, leaving them red with irritation. I walked for a long time. To the rare passersby I must have looked like a mad woman, but I returned home feeling stronger and much calmer.

When I walked through the door, hair and clothes soaking and looking to all the world like I’d just been exhumed from Neptune’s cave, I think Mum had a few thoughts that I was becoming seriously unhinged, but after I showered and dried my hair and spoke to her in a rational manner she left to pick up Isabel reassured I still retained at least some of my faculties.

While she was out I made another phone call.

‘You have some nerve calling here,’ said Pamela when she answered the phone.

I sighed. ‘I really don’t want to get into an argument with you, Pamela. Anyway, I thought you’d be pleased to finally see the back of me. What I was calling about is next Wednesday. I want you to know that the events of last night haven’t changed anything in that regard and I was still planning to send Isabel to your place as usual. Would you like her to come?’

‘Oh…yes I would. I thought…’

‘Good, but remember she is quite vocal these days, and if I hear you have been saying things to her about me the whole arrangement will be terminated immediately.’

‘Alright,’ she said snippily, which suggested my warning may well have been necessary.

‘Okay, Mum will drop her off at 4pm, as before. Bye.’

With Isabel plonked in front of Play School my mother bailed me up, ‘So tell me more about your argument with Tony.’

‘Can we leave it till a family conference tomorrow night? I have