Helliconia Summer - Brian W. Aldiss [471]
‘Whatever your brother knew, it was that which sent you escaping into your paralysis – not his actual death, as everyone pretends.’ She was twelve years and a tenner, not much more than a child: yet a tension in her gestures made her seem much older. She raised an eyebrow at his puzzlement.
He followed her into the room, wishing to ask her more, yet tongue-tied. ‘How do you know these things, Insil? You invent them to make yourself mysterious. Always locked in these rooms …’
She set the jug of water down on a table beside a bunch of white flowers which she had picked earlier. The flowers lay scattered on the polished surface, their faces reflected as in a misted mirror.
As though to herself, she said, ‘I try to train you not to grow up like the rest of the men here …’
She walked over to the window, framed in heavy brown curtains which hung from ceiling to floor. Although she stood with her back to him, he sensed that she was not looking out. The dual sunlight, shining in from two different directions, dissolved her as if it were liquid, so that her shadow on the tiled floor appeared more substantial than she. Insil was demonstrating once more her elusive nature.
It was a room he had not entered before, a typical Esikananzi room, loaded with heavy furniture. It held a tantalising scent, in part repugnant. Perhaps its only purpose was to hoard furniture, most of it wooden, against the day when the Weyr-Winter came and no more furniture would be made. There was a green couch with carved scrollwork, and a massive wardrobe which dominated the chamber. All the furniture had been imported; he saw that by its style.
He shut the door, remaining there contemplating her. As if he did not exist, she began arranging her flowers in a vase, pouring water from the jug into the vase, shuffling the stems peremptorily with her long fingers.
He sighed. ‘My mother is always sickly, too, poor thing. Every day of her life she goes into pauk and communes with her dead parents.’
Insil looked up sharply at him. ‘And you – while you were lying flat on your back – I suppose you’ve fallen into the habit of pauk too?’
‘No. You’re mistaken. My father forbade me … besides, it’s not just that …’
Insil put fingers to her temples. ‘Pauk is what the common people do. It’s so superstitious. To go into a trance and descend into that awful underworld, where bodies rot and those ghastly corpses are still spitting the dregs of life … oh, it’s disgusting. You’re sure you don’t do it?’
‘Never. I imagine my mother’s sickness comes from pauk.’
‘Well, sherb you, I do it every day. I kiss my grandmother’s corpse-lips and taste the maggots …’ Then she burst into laughter. ‘Don’t look so silly. I’m joking. I hate the thought of those things underground and I’m glad you don’t go near them.’
She lowered her gaze to the flowers.
‘These snowflowers are tokens of the world’s death, don’t you think? There are only white flowers now, to go with the snow. Once, so the histories say, brightly coloured flowers bloomed in Kharnabhar.’
She pushed the vase resignedly from her. Down in the throats of the pale blossoms, a touch of gold remained, turning to a speck of intense red at the ovary, like an emblem of the vanishing sun.
He sauntered across to her, over the patterned tiles. ‘Come and sit on the couch with me and talk of happier things.’
‘You must be referring to the climate – declining so rapidly that our grandchildren, if we live to have any, will spend their lives in near-darkness, wrapped in animal skins. Probably making animal noises … That sounds a promising topic.’
‘What nonsense you talk!’ Laughing, he jumped forward and grasped her. She let him drag her down on the couch as he uttered fevered endearments.
‘Of course you can’t make love to me, Luterin. You may feel me as you have before, but no lovemaking. I don’t think I shall ever take kindly to lovemaking – but in any case, were I to permit it, you would lose your interest in me, your lust being satisfied.’
‘It’s a lie, a lie.’
‘It had best stand as the truth, if we are to have any marital