Hit List - Lawrence Block [74]
That was a simplification, he thought, but it was close enough. “Even without the stamps,” he said, “I couldn’t have retired. Well, I could have, but I couldn’t have stayed retired.”
“You’re saying you need the work.”
“I guess so, yes.”
“You need to do what you do.”
“Evidently.”
“Some inner need.”
“I suppose. I don’t get a kick out of it, you know.”
“I never thought you did.”
“Sometimes, you know, it’s tricky, and there’s the satisfaction that comes from solving a problem. Like a crossword puzzle. You fill in the last square and the thing’s complete.”
“Stands to reason.”
“But that’s only some of the time. Mostly all it is is work. You go someplace, you do the job, you come home.”
“And you get paid.”
“Right. And I don’t mind long layoffs between jobs. I find ways to keep busy, and that was true even before I started with the stamps.”
“But all of a sudden something’s different.”
“Roger’s got something to do with it,” he said. “The idea that somebody’s out there, you know? Lurking in the shadows, waiting to make his move. Doesn’t even know who I am and he wants to kill me anyway.”
“Stress,” Dot said.
“Well, I suppose. And, you know, once we figured out what he was doing and why, the bastard disappeared.”
“We stopped giving him opportunities,” she pointed out. “Once you started flying to less obvious airports and we stopped letting the client send somebody to meet you, we shut Roger out. I’d have to call that a good thing, Keller. You’re still breathing, right?”
“Right.”
“And the last three jobs, well, even if he was lurking on the scene, he still couldn’t get a look at you, could he? Because you didn’t do anything.”
“I would have,” he said. “If I’d had any kind of a chance.”
“But you didn’t, and if Roger was around all he could do was stand there with his thumb up his nose, and you came home and got paid. I don’t see a major problem here, Keller.”
“It’s being teased like this,” he said. “Packing my bag, going someplace, figuring out what I’ll do and how I’ll do it, and the rug’s pulled out from under me. I don’t like it, that’s all.”
“I can understand that.”
He lowered his eyes, sorted out his thoughts. Then he said, “Dot, I almost killed somebody.”
“Except you couldn’t, because he killed himself first.”
“No, forget that. Here.”
“Here?”
“Not here,” he said, gesturing. “Not right here in White Plains. In New York. And not for business.”
She looked at him sharply. “What’s that leave, Keller? For pleasure?”
“Dot, for God’s sake.”
“Well, what else is there?”
“Personal reasons.”
“Oh, right,” she said, relaxing. “Don’t take it personally, Keller, but sometimes I forget you have a personal life.”
“There’s this woman I was seeing,” he said.
“Dresses in black.”
“That’s the one.”
“Wants to keep it superficial, won’t have dinner with you or let you buy her anything.”
“Right.”
“And you wanted to kill her?”
“I didn’t exactly want to,” he said, “but I almost did.”
“No kidding,” Dot said. “What did she do to piss you off, if you don’t mind my asking? Was she sleeping with somebody else?”
“No,” he said, and then thought about it. “Or maybe she was, for all I know. I never gave it much thought.”
“I guess you’re not the jealous type. So it must have been something serious, like eating crackers in bed.”
“I wasn’t angry.”
“If I just sit here quietly,” Dot said, “you’ll explain.”
When he’d finished, Dot took the empty pitcher inside and came back with a full one. “This weather,” she said, “I drink gallons of this stuff. You suppose it’s possible to drink too much iced tea?”
“No idea.”
“I guess everything’s bad for you if you take in enough of it.”
“I guess.”
“Keller,” she said, “the woman’s a loose end. Getting the impulse to tie her off doesn’t make you a homicidal maniac.”
“I never said—“
“I know what you never said. You think you’re frustrated because you keep going out on jobs and fate won’t let you pull the trigger. And maybe you are, but that’s not why the hair stood up on the back of your neck when your girlfriend said what she did.”
“It was more