Hope - Lesley Pearse [270]
There was no point in being angry that she had kept the birth of their child from him; he had, after all, always known that position and wealth meant more to her than love. But he found it hard to forgive her for not coming to him when she discovered that Hope was that child. Surely she must have known that he would have moved heaven and earth to find her?
Yet clearly it was written in the stars that he was intended to have Hope in his life, even if the path to that end was circuitous. When he met Nell by pure chance that day by the mill, he offered her the position of housekeeper more from sympathy than real need for help in his home. Yet it was one of the best decisions he’d ever made, for Nell had become a valued friend, and she’d created a stable, comfortable home, which was something he’d never had before.
When he discovered that the pretty surgeon’s wife who had been attacked in Varna was none other than her missing sister, he sawit as the most remarkable stroke of good fortune, a way of repaying Nell for all she’d done for him. Yet she was his daughter!
Looking back, and setting aside the connection with Nell, there was something about Hope which had drawn him to her right from the start.
He had, of course, thought it was only because of her sultry eyes, dark curly hair and her sweet face. In fact, he’d pulled himself up from thinking about her too often by reminding himself he was old enough to be her father.
Thankfully his feelings for her had never been ones of desire, but admiration at her courage, stoicism and nursing skills. Later, after she had stitched his wounds, there was deep gratitude, and amusement too because she was such a little firebrand.
Yet as time went on and he got to know both her and Bennett very well, he’d been stirred by what he could only call paternal feelings towards her. He felt real affection, he worried about her health when he knew she was carrying a child. When she left Balaclava he had felt emotional and even bereft.
It was that which had made him search for Bennett; and through the difficulties, he had urged himself on, going that extra mile for her. On the voyage home he felt so proud of himself for bringing her husband back to her. He had in fact been as excited at the prospect of seeing her again as Bennett was.
And now he’d been told she was his flesh and blood, that her baby was his grandchild. And that was like being presented with the sun, the moon and the stars.
*
‘She’s beautiful,’ Angus said gruffly, looking down at Betsy in her mother’s arms. ‘A father and a grandfather in one day! That’s enough to make even an old soldier cry.’
It was ten in the morning. Bennett was still in bed, Nell in the kitchen and Hope had come into his study with Betsy in her arms so he could see her.
‘Nell told you everything, then?’ Hope asked.
Angus nodded, and quickly wiped a tear from his cheek.
‘There’s so much to say, but I don’t know howto say it,’ he said. ‘I lay awake most of the night thinking on it. I thought I had it all straight in my head, but now I’m looking at Betsy…’ He stopped, fresh tears filling his eyes as he let the baby grasp one of his fingers.
‘We don’t need words surely?’ Hope said, looking up at him with tears in her eyes too. ‘We were friends from the first, weren’t we? Through you, Nell and I were reunited, and you made the Crimea a better place for me and Bennett by just being there. Then you rescued Bennett for me. So if it was some kind of apology you were trying to make, don’t.’
‘It wasn’t an apology I wanted to make,’ he said, reaching out to touch her cheek with tenderness. ‘It was more of a joyful outpouring of my delight. I am of course horrified and ashamed that I had no part in your childhood, for had I known of your birth I would have taken you and brought you up as my daughter, regardless of how others viewed that.’
‘Then perhaps it was as well you never knew about me,’ Hope said, and took the hand caressing her cheek and kissed it. ‘You would have been away soldiering and