How - Dov Seidman [88]
It is easy to draw and imagine pictures, but much more difficult for many of us to implement what they represent in daily life. Those who have had long and satisfying experiences with trusting environments can envision a very high level of certainty, while others, who have perhaps suffered in environments of betrayal and self-interested action, can imagine only distrust. But everyone has the ability to expand their vision of a trust-filled world. Like all journeys of knowledge, we can’t just leap from the Hill of B to the Hill of A; we must build our ability to imagine trust circles incrementally, one relationship at a time, one group at a time. Sometimes we will struggle in the Valley of C, where we have trusted the wrong people and been betrayed. But we can push out from where we are, no matter what our previous experience with trust has been, to reach the furthest limits of possibility. Perhaps you can accomplish one ring of your target, perhaps three. But when you get to the edge of one ring, and only when you get there, will you suddenly see the next ring to fill. Like climbing a mountain, you must crest one peak before you can see the next. Trust isn’t a switch you can turn on and off at will, but the power to envision it is strength you can build over time.
GOING ON A TRIP
So, what do we know about trust? We know that it fills the brain with powerful chemicals that strengthen interpersonal bonds by reducing fear. We know it fills the Certainty Gap, thereby defeating the arresting forces of insecurity and timidity that make us go slower when—to really thrive—we need to go faster. We know that trust begets trust between individuals and between corporations and that it builds more trust over time and repetition. We know it stimulates an upward spiral of cooperation and value. We know that trust fuels Waves that bring people and organizations closer together. It gives back as much energy as it takes to create, if not more, and enables risk-taking behavior. In short, we know that trust is active and propulsive; it is nothing short of inspirational.
It takes a journey to envision and learn about trust, but trust also propels its own trip. No book like this would be complete without an inspirational acronym and, not to be pedestrian, I’d like to offer just one that I have found encapsulates a lot of these ideas about trust:
TRIP
Trust
Risk
Innovation
Progress
Trust
The “T” in TRIP stands for trust. If we have just met, and I choose to extend you my trust, who is virtuous: Is it me for trusting you or you for being trustworthy? Aristotle said that the one who extends trust is virtuous. When I trust you (even though I’ve just met you), I’m giving you the power to let me down or do right by me. I’m the one who’s vulnerable, who takes the risk. Trusting, in a sense, means giving something away and ceding power to others, an essential step in achieving the outward focus needed in a hyperconnected world. Trust empowers others but, because it is a virtue, it also empowers one’s self. Trust at its very essence involves risk and provides the engine that powers this TRIP.
Risk
“R” stands for risk. We know that in business and in life, risk is directly proportional to return. “No risk, no reward,” says the cliché. The more rational risk you can take, the more you can accomplish. In environments of high uncertainty, forming trust circles becomes very difficult. Peter Kollack’s study demonstrated this clearly. We look closer to home for partners and limit our exposure to those with whom we’ve done business in the past, those to whom we are related, or those with whom we can reinforce trust ties with through personal and direct means like