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Of course, the birthday cake didn’t hurt either. It’s not really a Greek tradition to have dessert after meals. We viewed it as an American custom. When I was a kid, on a normal evening after the women had finished clearing the table and cleaning up after dinner, my mother and sisters would join us and we finished the meal with fruit. It was only on weekends when the cousins would come over—or at parties or on special occasions—that we would have pastries. But on our birthdays, we had a real American birthday cake with candles.

The meals we ate for our birthdays marked our special occasions—the food marked the occasion, not the other way around. That food, whether it was giouvarlakia for me or gemista (stuffed vegetables) for Maria, meant so much more to my parents. It is difficult, even for me, to comprehend that a single bite of giouvarlakia could represent so much: culture, my parents’ history and hardship, a new country, a new life, and now a family. But to my parents, all of these things were ingredients in every bite. The special food, made with love, was a vehicle to express the joy of that occasion—celebrating the birth of a child—and that was what made us feel special.

Now, any time I eat giouvarlakia, it transports me to my parents’ table and my childhood birthdays. And when I cook giouvesti (lamb with orzo), my brother Peter’s chosen birthday dish, at Kefi, I always think of him. In my home today, at my own table, we continue to celebrate this tradition. The same way my mother made our favorites with so much love, I too include that as an ingredient for my son.

This chapter is made up of the recipes for each of our favorite dishes from my family’s childhood birthday dinners. Just as garides me kritiko pilafi (shrimp with Cretan pilaf) will always evoke thoughts of my sister Anna for me, I hope that you too can take these recipes and create memories of your own.

LAMB SHANKS WITH ORZO

PODARAKIA ARNIOU ME KRITHARAKI

SERVES 6 FAMILY-STYLE WITH POTATOES OR ORZO, OR MORE AS PART OF A LARGER SPREAD

If you have some stock, this braise will have a richer, more intense flavor, but I make it here the way my mother would approach it. Note that whenever you braise something on the bone, the resulting liquid benefits from the marrow and you ultimately end up with a stock-flavored sauce. Plus, this recipe contains lots of herbs and flavorings, so the braise will still have great body and depth of flavor, even if you use only water.

6 lamb shanks, about 1 pound each

Kosher salt and cracked black pepper

2 tablespoons blended oil (90 percent canola, 10 percent extra-virgin olive)

1½ to 2 quarts water or meat stock, as needed

1 Spanish or sweet onion, roughly chopped

2 carrots, roughly chopped

2 stalks celery, roughly chopped

3 tablespoons tomato paste

¼ cup red wine

2 fresh bay leaves or 4 dried leaves

5 large sprigs fresh thyme

2 large sprigs fresh rosemary

1 tablespoon Garlic Purée (page 264) or cold, unsalted butter

Small handful torn fresh herbs, such as dill, mint, and/or parsley

Extra-virgin olive oil

Season the lamb shanks liberally with kosher salt and pepper. In a very large skillet, warm the blended oil over medium-high heat. Sear the lamb shanks on all sides until golden brown. Do this in batches if necessary to avoid overcrowding the pan. Transfer the shanks to a large Dutch oven. Pour off most of the oil from the skillet.

Preheat the oven to 325°F. Heat some water (or stock) for the braise. In the same skillet, add all the vegetables and soften for 3 to 5 minutes. Add the tomato paste and stir for 1 minute. Deglaze the pan with the red wine and let it reduce away.

Scatter the vegetable mixture over the lamb in the Dutch oven. Add enough of the hot water or stock to just cover the lamb, and add all the herbs, 1 tablespoon salt, and a generous grinding of pepper. Cover the pan and braise until the meat is falling off the bones, about 1½ to 2½ hours, depending on the size of the shanks.

Transfer the lamb and any