I Beat the Odds_ From Homelessness, to the Blind Side, and Beyond - Michael Oher [51]
It didn't take long to adjust to life there. In no time, Collins and S.J. became as real a brother and sister to me as the ones I was related to by blood. I bonded with both of them quickly--and bonding between siblings can mean fighting, too. I would wake up early and be ready to leave for school by six o'clock. Collins, on the other hand, would roll out of bed ten minutes before first period was supposed to start. I love that she is not a high-maintenance girl who needs hours to get ready, but it would drive me crazy. Just like when I had AAU basketball practice as a kid and would always be the first one to practice, I wanted to be the first one to school. That was where I was supposed to be and it was my responsibility to be there on time. Even on mornings when I didn't have my extra class before school started, I wanted to get there early, and if she and I were driving together, I would start to get nervous and impatient, pacing back and forth and calling upstairs every two minutes, "COME ON!!!" Days we didn't drive together, she would often meet me in the hallway to hand me my helmet or cleats or something I had forgotten in my rush to get out the door.
The same thing would happen on Sunday mornings. The Tuohys never told me I had to go to church with them, but if I was staying with them and they were my family, I felt I needed to go with them. I'd be the first one with my shirt and tie on, sitting downstairs on the sofa and looking at my watch constantly. I liked church. I wanted to be there on time. I didn't want to come in late because, let's be honest, there's no way someone like me can slip down the aisle into an empty spot in the pew totally unnoticed.
It was those little quirks in our relationship that let me know we were really a family. I could get frustrated or annoyed at someone, and they could get frustrated or annoyed with me. We didn't have to worry about being polite to one another all the time because I wasn't a guest. It was my house, too. They used to tease me as we'd drive to church because I would point out various corners where I used to sell papers, including the one where I made the most money, until a Walmart was opened just a block or so away and it took away my business. After a few weeks of that, whenever we'd all be in the car driving somewhere, someone would point to a random place on the street and say, "Did you sell papers there, Michael?" (Sometimes, they'll even do it in a totally different city, and it always makes me laugh.) I loved the joking because it meant that I was as real a part of the life of that family as anyone else. It was wonderful.
There was just one condition for living with the Tuohys, and this had been made clear to me since I first started relying on them: They wanted to make sure I was going to keep a relationship with my birth family. At no point did they want there to be any kind of a feeling like they had taken me away from my mother, or kept me from her and made me cut all ties. I was nervous about those visits to see my mother at first. Sean and Leigh Anne didn't push me to tell them why, but it was the same fear I'd had ever since I started living with Tony. I felt like I was fighting for every inch of distance I got between me and the old neighborhood and the thought of going back seemed like it was dangerous because it might pull me back into old habits, old friendships, and old ways of thinking and acting. I didn't love my brothers or mother any less, but I felt like keeping a safe distance from the'hood, at that point, was an act of survival.
But I went. Every other week or so I drove over to that side of town in Sean's Ford F-150 truck and I saw whichever of my brothers was around; usually it was Marcus or Carlos. I visited Craig whenever I could. I saw my mother, and it hurt so badly because I hated to see what drugs had done to her life. She was worn out, broken, and just a shell of herself. The loving, happy woman I remembered from when she was clean during my childhood didn't seem to be there, deep down in her soul anymore.
Eventually,