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By Root 600 0

let the oil cool down to a manageable temperature then filter it through the oil rig pictured here. A strainer catches the big pieces, while the cheesecloth between the strainer and the funnel works as a fine filter (If the oil is still warm, a cone-shaped coffee filter can be used.) I use a clean green wine bottle because, like red wine, oil doesn’t like light. The tall, narrow shape of the wine bottle helps keep most of the oil away from the other thing it doesn’t like: air. After the filtering, I add new oil up to a line, marked by a heavy rubber band, which tells me I’ve got enough to reach the “fill” line on the fryer. I cork the bottle tightly and store it away from the light. This doesn’t mean I never get rid of the oil—it won’t last forever—but if I start out with peanut or safflower oil, I find I get five or six sessions out of it, depending of course on the target food.

When it is time to ditch, I’ve still got a challenge because I don’t generally have many coffee cans around. I do have some pretty stout freezer bags, though, which I hold on to after they seem to have picked up a few too many fragrances for my liking. So I put the bag inside an empty paint can, fill it up, seal it (here comes the nerdy part), and use my cigar lighter to barely melt the edge, thus sealing it forever. I then seal this in yet another bag and after that the dog doesn’t even try to get into it—you could drop it on the sidewalk and nothing would happen.

FIRE!

The majority of home fires start—you guessed it—in the kitchen. Prevention, of course, is the best medicine, so keep recipe books, dishtowels, and the like away from heat sources, and be prepared if you do see flames. Don’t automatically think bucket brigade. A grease fire needs to be starved of air; dousing it with water will make it worse. Small fires can be smothered using the lid to a pot or a couple of handfuls of baking soda. If that fails, reach for your trusty fire extinguisher. Yes, you should have a fire extinguisher nearby. There are three classes of fire extinguishers. Class A are for standard combustibles, paper, fabric, and wood, but should never be used on burning liquids or electrical fires. Class B are for flammable liquids, while class C don’t conduct electricity and are the choice for “live” electrical fires. Every kitchen should have a BC-class or ABC-class extinguisher.

Why is frying in 350° F oil so fast and furious compared to cooking in a 500° F oven? Remember, from my rambling diatribe on conduction, that temperature is only one piece of the heat equation, just as voltage is only one part of an electrical equation.

Consider:

• Joe weighs more than some cattle and pummels people for a living.

• Clive weighs less than a heavy wind and punches a keyboard for a living, or at least he used to.

• Based solely on this information one might determine that Joe has more potential to do damage to you if he were to hit you.

But there are other factors to consider:

• Joe has been hit in the head many, many times. He is easily distracted by things like puppies, which he likes to pet. In other words, his ability to deliver on all that physical potential is limited.

• Clive, on the other hand, has years of rage stored in his wiry frame. He just got laid off, blames the world for his persistent acne, and is carrying a piece of lead pipe.

• Joe is a 500° F oven. Clive is 350° F oil.

PANKO

Also referred to by some as Japanese-style bread crumbs, these have a coarser texture than ordinary bread crumbs and make for a great crunchy crust. The tan-colored crumbs are made from a whole loaf of bread, while the white ones result from using the bread without the crust. If you can’t find them on your local grocery’s shelves, check upscale stores or Asian markets. Suitable substitutes for panko include regular bread crumbs or cracker meal.

BREADING, DREDGES, AND BATTERS, OH MY

Fried foods are unique in that they usually have some kind of starchy coating. This coat, which Brillat-Savarin referred to as the “surprise,” can be as