Invisible man - Ralph Ellison [190]
Suddenly Jack smiled and slipped back into his fatherly role.
"Let us handle the theory and the business of strategy," he said. "We are experienced. We're graduates and while you are a smart beginner you skipped several grades. But they were important grades, especially for gaining strategical knowledge. For such it is necessary to see the overall picture. More is involved than meets the eye. With the long view and the short view and the overall view mastered, perhaps you won't slander the political consciousness of the people of Harlem."
Can't he see I'm trying to tell them what's real, I thought. Does my membership stop me from feeling Harlem?
"All right," I said. "Have it your way, Brother; only the political consciousness of Harlem is exactly a thing I know something about. That's one class they wouldn't let me skip. I'm describing a part of reality which I know."
"And that is the most questionable statement of all," Tobitt said.
"I know," I said, running my thumb along the edge of the table, "your private source tells you differently. History's made at night, eh, Brother?"
"I've warned you," Tobitt said.
"Brother to brother, Brother," I said, "try getting around more. You might learn that today was the first time that they've listened to our appeals in weeks. And I'll tell you something else: If we don't follow through on what was done today, this might be the last . . ."
"So, he's finally gotten around to predicting the future," Brother Jack said.
"It's possible . . . though I hope not."
"He's in touch with God," Tobitt said. "The black God."
I looked at him and grinned. He had gray eyes and his irises were very wide, the muscles ridged out on his jaws. I had his guard down and he was swinging wild.
"Not with God, nor with your wife, Brother," I told him. "I've never met either. But I've worked among the people up here. Ask your wife to take you around to the gin mills and the barber shops and the juke joints and the churches, Brother. Yes, and the beauty parlors on Saturdays when they're frying hair. A whole unrecorded history is spoken then, Brother. You wouldn't believe it but it's true. Tell her to take you to stand in the areaway of a cheap tenement at night and listen to what is said. Put her out on the corner, let her tell you what's being put down. You'll learn that a lot of people are angry because we failed to lead them in action. I'll stand on that as I stand on what I see and feel and on what I've heard, and what I know."
"No," Brother Jack said, getting to his feet, "you'll stand on the decision of the committee. We've had enough of this. The committee makes your decisions and it is not its practice to give undue importance to the mistaken notions of the people. What's happened to your discipline?"
"I'm not arguing against discipline. I'm trying to be useful. I'm trying to point out a part of reality which the committee seems to have missed. With just one demonstration we could --"
"The committee has decided against such demonstrations," Brother Jack said. "Such methods are no longer effective."
Something seemed to move out from under me, and out of the corner of my eye I was suddenly aware of objects on the dark side of the hall. "But didn't anyone see what happened today?" I said. "What was that, a dream? What was ineffective about that crowd?"
"Such crowds are only our raw materials, one of the raw materials to be shaped to our program."
I looked around the table and shook my head. "No wonder they insult me and accuse us of betraying them . . ."
There was a sudden movement.
"Repeat that," Brother Jack shouted, stepping forward.
"It's true, I'll repeat it. Until this afternoon they've been saying that the Brotherhood betrayed them. I'm telling you what's been said to me, and that it why Brother Clifton disappeared."
"That's an indefensible lie," Brother Jack said.
And I looked at him slowly now, thinking, If this is it, this is it . . . "Don't call me that," I said softly. "Don't ever call me that, none of you. I've told you what I've