Jared's Counterfeit Fiancee - Brenda Jackson [23]
He nodded. “All right. What would you like to talk about?”
Dana sighed deeply. Even now she felt it, the hot, sultry passion that radiated between them, that was always there whenever they were together. It was that passion, the sexual chemistry, the strong attraction that let her know she was walking on dangerous ground with him.
“Our kisses,” she said, almost in a whisper. But the sudden intensity of his expression let her know he had heard her.
“Our kisses?”
She looked down at her coffee cup again when she saw the desire that darkened his eyes. After pulling in a deep breath she met his eyes again. “Yes.”
He tilted his head at an angle that seemed to make his gaze focus in on her. Only on her. “What about our kisses, Dana?”
Her palms were beginning to feel sweaty and her insides felt like molten liquid with his question. She wished she could respond by stating that she wanted more of them, but knew that would definitely be a wrong answer. She could barely handle the ones she had gotten so far.
She cleared her throat. “I—I don’t want them to lead to other things.”
He stared at her a moment then asked, “Does your definition of other things include what you and Cord never got around to doing?”
She bit her lip and tried not to look at him. “Yes.”
After a brief pause he said, “Dana?”
The way he said her name only forced her to look at him. “Yes?”
“Why does the thought of making love to me bother you?” he asked softly.
She felt a tiny pull in the pit of her stomach at the silky timbre in his voice. The thought of making love to him didn’t bother her but it did keep her constantly off balance and made her imagine some wild and purely wicked things. It also had her conscious of her sexual state more so than ever.
She hadn’t slept with a man in almost four years. That fact hadn’t bothered her before. It had seldom crossed her mind. Now it did. She was experiencing wants and desires for the first time and had a feeling that a sexual experience with Jared would obliterate her long-standing belief that sex was highly overrated. She knew to ask for a purely platonic relationship would not be realistic. After all, she was a woman and he was a man unlike any other she’d ever known. He had a way of making her feel attractive, wanted and desired.
The silence between them had stretched long enough and she knew that he deserved an answer. “It doesn’t bother me, Jared. It confuses me.”
He didn’t say anything for a long moment, and then he said, “Although I want to share a physical relationship with you, would it help to give you my word that I won’t push you into doing anything you aren’t ready for?”
She frowned. “That’s just it, Jared. How will I know when I’m ready for anything? All of this is rather new to me.”
“You’ll know, Dana. You’ll know better than anyone,” he said softly. “I’d be telling a lie if I said I didn’t want you. Even now, I want you so bad I ache with the thought of having you. I’m not Luther Cord. But since our engagement is not the real thing, I won’t expect or assume anything. How far we take things will always be up to you.”
“Thank you.”
A warm shudder of awareness passed through them as well as an understanding and acceptance of their predicament. Jared recognized the depth of desire in her eyes although he knew she did not.
A part of him wanted to curse the two fools that had made her think that lovemaking wasn’t worth losing sleep over. There was no doubt in his mind that if he ever made love to her, sleep wouldn’t be involved. just constant pleasure, gratification and enjoyment all night long.
“And as far as the kisses,” he said. “They can be dangerous but necessary. Engaged couples do kiss, so a certain degree of open affection will be expected. And although we don’t have to kiss when we’re alone, I enjoy kissing you and hope you enjoy kissing me, as well. But if you prefer that—”
“Kissing is fine,