Junie B., First Grader_ Dumb Bunny - Barbara Park [12]
May stamped her foot.
“No, I did not, Sheldon! I did not push you! You pushed yourself!” she said.
She turned and looked at the daddy.
“It was the darnedest thing you ever saw,” she said. “He shoved himself right through that shrub.”
The daddy stood there a real long time.
Then he walked to a picnic bench.
And he sat down real slow.
And he hit himself in the head.
I went over and tapped on him.
“I would just like to point out that the bunny did not run,” I said. “The bunny was the only one who walked.”
May overheard me.
“That's because the bunny can't run or the bunny falls down,” she called. “The bunny should not get credit for that!”
The daddy hit himself in the head again.
I walked back to Herbert.
He looked kind of worried.
“The daddy is coming unglued,” he said. I nodded.
“Yes,” I said. “The daddy is going to need backup, I believe.”
Backup is the grown-up word for the police might need to come, possibly.
And guess what? Me and Herb were not the only ones thinking that, either.
’Cause just then, Lucille's nanna hollered out real loud.
“Enough!” she hollered. “I have had enough of this nonsense with you children!”
Then she cupped her hands around her mouth. And she shouted out a brand-new rule.
It was called, If there's any more running or fighting, she is going to call the cops.
All of the children did a loud gulp.
I looked at Herbert.
“That new rule seems a little harsh,” I said.
Only guess what else?
The new rule worked, I think.
’Cause pretty soon, the nanna started the egg hunt again.
And this time, no one ran at all!
No one even walked, hardly.
Instead, we all behaved like little ladies and gentlemen. And we hunted for eggs very polite.
May stuck to Sheldon like glue.
I tried to stick to him, too. But my giant feet could not keep up that good.
May kept on grouching.
“You're not going to get the golden egg before I do, Sheldon. Even if you know where it is, I'll still beat you to it,” she said. “I'm all over you like flies on egg salad.”
Sheldon rolled his eyes.
“But I don't know where the golden egg is, May,” he said. “I've already told you that. I don't know anything at all.”
I cupped my mitts around my mouth.
“I believe you, Sheldon! I believe you don't know anything at all!” I shouted. “I've never thought you've known anything at all!”
After that, I hurried to catch up to him.
’Cause I definitely thought he knew something, of course.
Sheldon turned to wait for me.
Then, all of a sudden, he glanced down at the ground. And he did a loud gasp.
“I SEE ONE! I SEE ONE! I SEE ONE!” he shouted.
May and I turned to look.
There was a bright green egg under the bushes.
Sheldon clapped and laughed.
Then he hurried over to pick it up.
But …
WHOOSH!
SWOOP!
SCOOP!
May ducked underneath him speedy fast. And she picked it up instead!
“I GOT IT! I GOT IT! I GOT IT!” she screeched.
Then she put the egg in her basket and danced all around.
Sheldon's face got sputtery mad.
But—before he could even yell at her— he did another gasp.
“I SEE ONE! I SEE ONE! I SEE ONE!” he shouted, even louder than before.
Then he clapped his hands.
And he laughed real happy.
And he hurried over to pick it up.
But …
WHOOSH!
SWOOP!
SCOOP!
May beat him to it again!
“TWO! TWO! NOW I HAVE TWO!” she hollered.
She jumped in the air and kicked her feet.
“I swooped! I'm a swooper! I swoop!” she said.
She ran back to Sheldon and leaned in his face.
“I knew I would beat you at this game,” she said. “Now I have two eggs, and you and Junie B. have …”
She leaned her head into our baskets.
“Hmm. Let's count them … ZERO! Ha! You have zero. And I have two! Two to zero. Two to zippedy-zip zero!”
Sheldon looked at me real upset.
I frowned my eyes at him.
“Helpful hint,” I said. “Stop shouting, ‘I SEE ONE.’”
Sheldon pointed at his magic-egg shirt.
“But I just don't get it, Junie B.,” he said. “My grampa said that the egg is with me. So why isn't this magic shirt working?”
I looked closer at the egg dribble.
“Maybe it's not lucky,” I said. “Maybe it's just dirty.