Junie B. Jones and Some Sneaky Peeky Spying - Barbara Park [4]
Only all of a sudden I remembered about how she told me no more spying. And so maybe I might get in trouble with her, I think.
That’s how come I stopped running. And I started to go back to peek at Mrs. some more. But Mother already spotted me.
“Hey! Where are you going?” she called at me. “Come here.”
“Yeah, only I can’t come there,” I explained. “’Cause I just remembered something very important. And it’s called—I’m not done drinking yet!”
Then I runned right back to the water fountain. Only Mrs. and the strange man were already disappeared.
“Shoot,” I said. “Where did those Sneaky Petes go to?”
After that I had to look all over the store for those guys.
First, I looked where the chocolate milk was. Then I looked where the pasketti and tomato sauce was. And I also looked where the delicious candy was.
Only guess where I finally found them?
At the stinky dumb vegetables! That’s where!
I quick ducked down and hided around the corner.
Then I did some sneaky peeky spying on them.
I saw Mrs. picking out yucky blucky brockly.
And stewie pewie tomatoes.
And also the kind of vegetable named Sue Keeny.
Except for then the strange man snatched Sue Keeny right out of her hands. And he tried to put it back on the shelf.
Only Mrs. grabbed it right back again. And she pretended to hit him on the head with it. And then they both started laughing very much.
That’s when a very terrible thing happened.
And it’s called—Mrs. and the strange man did a big smoochie kiss!
And it was in front of the whole entire everybody!
I covered my eyes. That’s ’cause I was shamed of her, of course. On account of teachers shouldn’t do that smoochie thing!
After that, I peeked my eyes between my fingers. And I saw Mrs. standing at the grapes.
She picked up a bunch of the green kind. Then she pulled some grapes right off the top of it.
And that’s when the most terriblest thing of all happened!
Because just then, Mrs. put the grapes in her mouth!
And she ATE them!
Mrs. ATE the GRAPES!
And she didn’t even PAY for them!
“Oh no,” I whispered very upset. “Oh no. Oh no.”
’Cause eating is the same thing as stealing, remember?
And teachers aren’t supposed to do stealing! Teachers are supposed to be perfecter than that! ’Cause they have to set a good zample for little children!
After that I felt very sickish inside of my stomach.
On account of Mrs. didn’t even get caught and learn her lesson!
’Cause nobody saw what she did!
Not the store guy.
Not the strange man.
Nobody.
Nobody except for me.
6/Squeezy Lips
I didn’t tattletale on Mrs.
That’s ’cause if I told Mother, I would get in trouble for spying.
And if I told the store guy, Mrs. might go to jail.
And so I just keeped it a secret inside my head.
’Cause nobody can see secrets inside your head.
Not even if they look in your ears.
On Sunday Grandma and Grampa Miller came to our house for dinner. Only I couldn’t talk to them that much.
That’s because secrets are very slippery. And I didn’t want it to slip out of my mouth by accident.
“Why so quiet tonight, Junie B.?” said Grandma Miller at the table. “Cat got your tongue?”
My mouth went wide open.
“What cat, Grandma? Is it the same cat that got killed by the ice cream truck? How come he wants to get my tongue? Did his tongue get squished in the accident?”
Grandma Miller made a face. Then she didn’t eat her roast beef anymore.
Mother looked surprised at me. “You sure did get chatty all of a sudden. Does this mean you’re not mad about the cookies anymore?”
And so then I remembered to stop talking again. Or else my secret might slip out.
I squeezed my lips together very tight.
And guess what else? Even the next day—when I was on the bus to school—my lips still stayed squeezed.
“Hi, Junie B.,” said my bestest friend Grace.
I did a wave at her.
That Grace frowned at me. “How come you’re not saying hi? You have to say hi. It’s the rules.”
Except for I still didn’t say hi.
And so then she called me the name of big stinky.
And when we got to school, that Grace told Lucille