Killer of Men - Christian Cameron [107]
His grandfather tried to stop it. But the other judges said there was enough light, and I was an arse, and simply insisted I’d fight.
‘You’re a fucking slave,’ he said, and he grinned. ‘I own you already. Slaves always fear men like me – real men. Do you feel the fear, boy?’
The thing I hated was that of course I did feel the fear. I did fear men like him – big, brutal men who wanted to inflict pain. And my fear made me hate him, and the daimon came.
Suddenly I was as cool as if I had bathed in the sea.
When we came together, I already knew how I would fight, and what I would do. The daimon was in me, and I give no quarter then. And truly, I have done shameful things, but this was hardly one of them. He was an evil bastard, and he earned his way to Tartarus all the way.
But I regret – some of it.
As soon as his grandfather gave the word, he came at me, his sword high, and smashed it into my shield.
He cut at the top, his tactic simple. He would cut the bronze band that held the rim in five or ten strokes, and then start chopping the shield until he broke my arm or cut my shield arm. It was a brutal technique, and he was a brutal man.
I ducked and dodged. I wanted him contemptuous and hurried.
He was easy.
He laughed and spat and chased me, landing a blow or two on the shield face. He finally stopped.
‘Fucking coward, stand and fight!’ he yelled.
I laughed. ‘Come and catch me, arse cunt.’
Some men heard me. Others didn’t. He heard me, and he should have paused to consider that if I had the breath to insult him, I wasn’t afraid. But he was a fool.
But his grandfather had heard him and threw down his staff. ‘Stop!’ he roared.
He picked up his staff and prodded his grandson in the stomach. ‘Boys talk like that,’ he said. ‘Men respect their opponents. One more jibe and I will throw you from the lists.’
Cleisthenes didn’t even pretend to obey. He did not fear the gods, and they knew him for what he was.
Before Lord Pelagius gave the word, he came at me again, and he almost caught me, because, in fact, he cheated. His sword hammered my shield and we were shield to shield. The sword went back and he cut at my head. His blow clipped the rim of my shield and then my helmet, and it hurt.
‘I’m going to kill you,’ he crowed.
I could tell you that the pain of his blow made me do what I did, but I promised not to lie much when I told these tales. I knew from the moment we crossed swords. I always meant to kill him. Honey, I’m a killer. A little more wine. Your friend is blushing.
I danced away and he came after me, sure that he had me. And I let him come. He came in to hammer my shield, and I cut his sword hand off his arm as easy as making your friend blush.
See, he’d over-extended a little more with each cut, trying to get the biggest part of his blade into my shield rim. I just led him by the nose until I had his arm where I wanted it. And I could have simply given him a cut to remember.
He fell to his knees. He couldn’t get the shield off his shield arm and he couldn’t get a hand on his wrist to staunch the blood, and it was pumping out, almost like a neck wound.
If he’d had a friend in that circle, perhaps that man would have stepped up and stopped the blood. Or maybe not. What’s a man worth with no right hand, like a criminal?
His grandfather stepped forward – and then paused.
That was the awful part. His own grandfather let him bleed out. And the other men in the circle – a conspiracy of two hundred.
He was gone quickly, but his eyes went to mine near the end, and suddenly he wasn’t a bad man, a rapist, a tax-taker, a bully. He was a deer under my spear, and he didn’t understand the darkness that was coming, or why it had to come to him. And in his eyes I saw the reflection of that god who comes to every man and every woman, and I also saw myself – the killer.
I didn’t look away. I held his eye until he fell forward and everything was gone.
But as his soul left his body, I think something of me went with it.
I killed him because I didn’t like him.
And when my eyes met Aristides’, I could see that