Kim (Barnes & Noble Classics Series) - Rudyard Kipling [58]
‘For a day and a night and a day,’ Kim pleaded.
‘No, ye don’t!’ Father Victor saw Kim edging towards the door, and interposed a strong leg.
‘I do not understand the customs of white men. The Priest of the Images in the Wonder House in Lahore was more courteous than the thin one here. This boy will be taken from me. They will make a Sahib of my disciple? Woe to me! How shall I find my River? Have they no disciples? Ask.’
‘He says he is very sorree that he cannot find the River now any more. He says, Why have you no disciples, and stop bothering him? He wants to be washed of his sins.’
Neither Bennett nor Father Victor found any answer ready.
Said Kim in English, distressed for the lama’s agony: ‘I think if you will let me go now we will walk away quiettly and not steal. We will look for that River like before I was caught. I wish I did not come here to find the Red Bull and all that sort of thing. I do not want it.’
‘It’s the very best day’s work you ever did for yourself, young man,’ said Bennett.
‘Good heavens, I don’t know how to console him,’ said Father Victor, watching the lama intently. ‘He can’t take the boy away with him, and yet he’s a good man—I’m sure he’s a good man. Bennett, if you give him that rupee he’ll curse you root and branch!’
They listened to each other’s breathing—three—five full minutes. Then the lama raised his head, and looked forth across them into space and emptiness.
‘And I am a Follower of the Way,’ he said bitterly. ‘The sin is mine and the punishment is mine. I made believe to myself—for now I see it was but make-belief—that thou wast sent to me to aid in the Search. So my heart went out to thee for thy charity and thy courtesy and the wisdom of thy little years. But those who follow the Way must permit not the fire of any desire or attachment, for that is all Illusion. As says ...’ He quoted an old, old Chinese text, backed it with another, and reinforced these with a third. ‘I stepped aside from the Way, my chela. It was no fault of thine. I delighted in the sight of life, the new people upon the roads, and in thy joy at seeing these things. I was pleased with thee who should have considered my Search and my Search alone. Now I am sorrowful because thou art taken away and my River is far from me. It is the Law which I have broken!’
‘Powers of Darkness below!’ said Father Victor, who, wise in the confessional, heard the pain in every sentence.
‘I can see now that the sign of the Red Bull was a sign for me as well as for thee. All Desire is red—and evil. I will do penance and find my River alone.’
‘At least go back to the Kulu woman,’ said Kim, ‘otherwise thou wilt be lost upon the roads. She will feed thee till I run back to thee.’
The lama waved a hand to show that the matter was finally settled in his mind.
‘Now,’—his tone altered as he turned to Kim,—‘what will they do with thee? At least I may, acquiring merit, wipe out past ill.’
‘Make me a Sahib—so they think. The day after to-morrow I return. Do not grieve.’
‘Of what sort? Such an one as this or that man?’ He pointed to Father Victor. ‘Such an one as those I saw this evening—men wearing swords and stamping heavily?’
‘Maybe.’
‘That is not well. These men follow desire and come to emptiness. Thou must not be of their sort.’
‘The Umballa priest said that my Star was War,’ Kim interjected. ‘I will ask these fools—but there is truly no need. I will run away this night, for all I wanted to see the new things.’
Kim put two or three questions in English to Father Victor, translating the replies to the lama.
Then: ‘He says, “You take him from me and you cannot say what you will make him.” He says, “Tell me before I go, for it is not a small thing to make a child.” ’
‘You will be sent to a school. Later on, we shall see. Kimball, I suppose you’d like to be a soldier?’
‘ Gorah-log [white-folk] . No-ah! No-ah!’ Kim shook his head violently. There was nothing in his composition to which drill and routine appealed. ‘I will not be a soldier.’
‘You will be what you’re told to be,’ said Bennett; ‘and you should be grateful