Kiss & Die - Lee Weeks [85]
‘You never took the promotion,’ Mann reminded him.
‘No.’
‘Tom Sheng did.’
‘Tom Sheng liked what he saw when he walked on the dark side. I turned into someone I didn’t like; he respected the man he saw in the mirror, I hated him. Sometimes our paths crossed, Tom and me. We were both undercover at the same time. Both as members of the Wo Shing Shing. We were in different branches, responsible for different things. I was part of the team in charge of getting the drugs into Hong Kong. He was part of the one responsible for getting it distributed. We liaised as Triads, never as policemen.’ Ng paused. ‘I didn’t take the promotion because I wasn’t sure what I did was right. I wasn’t sure it made me a better cop. I want to save lives not help distribute the drugs that end them, even if the overall goal was a good one. I have been a Buddhist ever since. Your father was a Buddhist; he tried to do good in the end. He just ran out of time.’
‘My father still has a hold on this world. His legacy lives on and now I have to wonder whether even Tammy has paid the price for it. Was I too distracted with my father’s business that I wasn’t thinking straight? Did I fuck up?’
Mann read Ng’s eyes. There was a sadness in them that he understood. The sky above was faultless, the sun bounced off the rooftops. Mann looked for the eagles. He saw one watching him as it hovered by the window. Mann turned back to Ng.
‘I wish I had the one answer to it all, Ng.’
‘You do have, in your heart. Your eyes are on the horizon again, Genghis. Remember the way is in your heart, not in the sky.’
There were no stars that evening, just cloud. Mann had been to see Tammy’s mother. Ng had offered but Mann wanted to. He wanted to feel the full weight of it. She thanked Mann, comforted by his concern. It was all Tammy had ever wanted – to be a police officer. She died doing something she loved. She died making a difference.
It was bullshit. Mann had to look away when she said it. He felt like he had personally sent Tammy to her death. He felt like his was the hand that held the knife. His mood was beyond just getting drunk. It was still steeped in anger. Five hours later Mann had bypassed any comfort he might have hoped to get from the alcohol he consumed that evening. It didn’t seem to matter how much he drank; he just got more sober. He headed for a side of town he hadn’t been to in a while – old Wanchai; a small remnant from the Suzie Wong era. In his pocket he had the piece of bondage tape used to tie Max Kosmos’s legs.
Halfway through the evening he headed down the steps to one of his old haunts, the Bond bar in Wanchai. He hadn’t been in the Bond bar for a while. It used to have a Bond Girl theme, not anymore. He’d heard it had been revamped. A big muscled doorman stood at the entrance. He was dressed like a gladiator. He looked Mann over as if trying to find a reason not to let him in. He grunted something and stood back to allow Mann to pass. As Mann walked through to the bar he could see that the place still specialized in sleaze; the bar was darker than ever. Each girl was sat in the middle of a raised podium bar, her body very close, and at eye level with her customers who sat around.
Mann went to sit at one of the far podiums. Four other men