Kiss of Midnight_ A Midnight Breed Novel - Lara Adrian [653]
“We’re waiting for solid intel on where Fabien has gone,” he said, the lie bitter on his tongue, regardless of his good intentions. “In the meantime, the Order is sending in reinforcements. We’ll be meeting up with them tonight.”
Renata listened, clearly trusting him at his word. “Does the Order have any idea whether Mira might be with Fabien wherever he is now?”
“We’re working on it.” Nikolai found it difficult to hold her unblinking pale green gaze. “When we find Fabien, we’ll find Mira. She’s going to be okay. I promised you that, remember?”
When he thought she might just nod her head or glance away, Renata instead reached out to cup his face in her palm. “Thank you… for standing by me through all of this. I don’t know how I will ever be able to repay you, Nikolai.”
He brought his hand up to hers and placed a tender kiss in her palm. He was going to say something glib, one of the usual empty quips he used so often whenever things around him got too real with emotion or too raw with honesty. He had his methods down pat: Deflect with humor. Disarm with nonchalance. Gut and run like hell at the first inkling of his own vulnerability.
But all those old, reliable weapons he’d honed to razor sharpness failed him now.
He stroked his thumb across the back of Renata’s hand and let himself get lost in the verdant haven of her eyes.
“I’m not very good at this,” he murmured. “I want to tell you something… shit, I’m gonna fuck it up probably, but I want you to know that I care about you. I do … a hell of a lot, Renata.”
She stared at him, going so still and silent he wasn’t even sure she was breathing.
“I care,” he blurted out, frustrated at himself for fumbling through the words that he wanted to be perfect for her. “I don’t know how it happened, or what it will even mean to you—if anything—but I need to say it anyway, because this is real. It’s real, and I’ve never felt this way before. Not about anyone.”
Her mouth softened into the smallest smile as he rambled clumsily, trying to find a way to tell her the depth of what was in his heart. Trying and failing miserably.
“What I’m trying to say is … “ He shook his head, feeling like a blithering ass, but Renata’s soft touch on his face soothed him. Her clear gaze brought him back, front and center, grounding him. “What I’m trying to tell you is, I’m falling for you … falling really hard. I wasn’t looking for this to happen. I didn’t think I’d ever truly want it, but… ah, Christ, Renata… when I look in your eyes, one word leaps into my mind every single time: Forever.”
She exhaled slowly and her little smile spread into beaming joy.
Niko ran his hands over her soft skin, into her damp hair. “I’m in love with you, Renata. I know I’m not a poet—shit, not even close. I don’t have all the fancy words I wish I could say to you… but I want you to know that what I’m feeling for you is real. I love you.”
She laughed softly. “What makes you think I’d want poetry or fancy words? You just said exactly what I want to hear, Nikolai.” She slid her hand around to the back of his neck and pulled him toward her for a long, passionate kiss. “I love you too,” she whispered against his mouth. “I’m scared as hell to admit that, but it’s true. I love you, Nikolai.”
He swept his lips over hers and held her close, wishing he didn’t ever have to let go. But dusk would be coming before long, and there was still one thing he needed to do. “You have to do something for me.”
Renata nestled against him. “Anything.”
“I don’t know what’s going to happen tonight, but I need to know that you’ll be going into this as strong as you can be. I want you to take some more of my blood.”
She rose out of his embrace and playfully arched a brow at him. “Are you sure you’re not just trying to get into my pants again?”
Niko chuckled, a jolt of heat arrowing right