Kushiel's Scion - Jacqueline Carey [180]
She gazed down at me, heavy-lidded and smiling. "How do you like your first lesson?"
I tried to answer, but only groaned.
I took my leave of her in the small hours before dawn, my head reeling and my body spent. I had made no promises and nothing was resolved between us, but when she kissed me good-bye at the door, I knew I would see her again. She'd dangled a mystery before me, and there was somewhat in me that couldn't stand not knowing.
And whatever else was true, the desire was real.
As before, a servant escorted me, carrying a lit torch. I glanced at his profile, quiet and disinterested, and wondered what he must think. They might know naught of the Unseen Guild, but there could be no doubt of what we'd been up to in her bedroom. I wondered, too, by what means Claudia assured herself of the discretion of her household staff.
I didn't dare ask.
At the insula gate, I thanked him. I stood there for a long time, my hand on the gate, watching his bobbing torch vanish and dwindle, my eyes adjusting to the starry darkness. It was late enough that all the taverns and wineshops had closed their doors here in the students' quarter. A faint odor of myrrh still hung in the air. All was quiet and still, save for Canis snoring in his barrel.
"You did warn me, didn't you?" I said to him. "Some goddess."
He smacked his lips in his sleep, uttering a long, gobbling sigh. I smiled a little, envying him his freedom. The thought of returning to our insula apartment made me feel stifled. Despite the lateness of the hour and my physical exhaustion, my mind was crowded with thoughts, too restless for sleep.
So I walked the city instead.
Foolish though it was, I couldn't help myself. I needed to be alone with my thoughts. I needed to feel the night air on my skin, erasing the scent of Claudia that clung to every inch of me. I had never been with a woman whose ardor more than equaled my own. This was a different game than the ones played in Valerian House, but it was a game of power nonetheless. It was intoxicating, as heady and dangerous as opium.
My thoughts went in circles, spinning uselessly. I tried to imagine what Joscelin would say, but I couldn't. I could only imagine him staring, blank and uncomprehending. He knew what it was to be driven mad by love, but not desire. The Cassiline discipline instilled in him ran too deep.
Phèdre… Phèdre would understand, all too well. I wished, more than ever, that she was here. I wanted to tell her about the Unseen Guild, and ask her if she thought it was true. Whatever else lay unspoken between us, I would have given anything to hear her give her clear, unfettered laugh and dismiss it as a fanciful tale. Even the thought of it made me smile. It might well be nothing more; a wild falsehood invented by a bored senator's wife to toy with a besotted young lover. But as much as I wanted to believe it were so, I didn't.
There were those words.
Tizrav, son of Tizmaht. I remembered, the Persian guide who led Phèdre and Joscelin into Drujan had met us two days away from the Akkadian border as we journeyed from Daršanga with the surviving remnants of the zenana in tow. He only had one eye, which is the sort of thing that one remembers as a child.
And there was no reason, no reason at all, for a bored senator's wife to know his name. Either the Unseen Guild was real, or someone was playing an incomprehensible game with me. Who or why, I couldn't begin to guess. Would it be wiser to walk away? Mayhap, I thought. But if I did, I would never know; and there might be more danger in ignorance. Claudia had hinted that mayhap I had an enemy I hadn't put a name to. At the very least, I could try to learn what she meant.
The sound of scuffling broke into my thoughts. With a start, I realized I had walked all the way to the wharf. In the fading starlight, I saw two figures struggling beside a darkened warehouse; a man and a woman.
"You—" She got out a muted squeak before he clamped a hand over her mouth.
"Hush!" He pushed her against the wall and fumbled with her skirts.