Kushiel's Scion - Jacqueline Carey [240]
As for me…
I felt the heat between us.
Always, at night. It was dangerous to share such close quarters. The first three nights, I lay awake long into the night, tossing on my pallet while Gilot slumbered, aware that only a thin wall divided us. I gritted my teeth and thought about Deccus Fulvius, snoring beside his wife, his beard pointed toward heaven, and hoped it would cool my blood.
It didn't.
On the last night ere we reached Lucca, I gave in to my restlessness, rising from my pallet and letting myself out of the room Gilot and I shared. I made my way down to the stable. All the world was sleeping; even the Bastard was dozing in his stall, his head hanging low, one rear leg cocked. I leaned on the stall door, watching his ribcage rise and fall, steady and comforting.
"Imriel."
I turned.
Claudia stood behind me, clad in a dress of russet velvet. She wore a shawl clutched round her shoulders and her hair spilled over it, dark red and abundant. She was shivering a little against the night's chill, and her face looked vulnerable.
"It wasn't just the Guild," she said. "It was never just the Guild."
"I don't believe you," I said.
"It's true." Her gaze was clear and candid. "And seeing you like this is driving me mad. I know, I was angry. I said hurtful things, but I didn't mean them, not really. It seems the Guild accepts your decision. Why does it mean everything has to end between us? There's so little time left."
"We can't do this." I shook my head. "Not under Deccus' nose."
"Why not?" Claudia asked.
I didn't answer and she drew near. Her heat and the scent of her skin surrounded me. I could feel my blood beating in my ears.
"I miss you," she whispered.
I kissed her, then. A part of me cursed myself for a fool, but ah, Elua! It felt glorious. I slid my hands into the dense, silken mass of her hair. Her lips parted under mine, and I kissed her hard and deep. Her full breasts pressed against my chest. I wanted her. I wanted to take her there in the stable with straw in her hair. I wanted to build a seraglio and tie her to the bedposts with silken cords, to make love to her until she begged me to stop.
Instead, I let her go.
"No," I said simply.
She stood, breathing hard, her lips swollen and her eyes dark with desire. "You're sure."
I nodded. "It's not just Deccus. It's Lucius, too. I can't do this on the eve of his wedding." I closed my eyes. "Claudia, if you have any fondness for me, please go. Before I change my mind."
After a moment, the straw rustled. "You men and your silly codes of honor. What does honor have to do with desire?" Her lips brushed my cheek, and her fingertips brushed my aching groin. "I expected something different from a D'Angeline," she whispered. "But I'll go."
She went.
I waited until she was gone, then went outside. I gazed at the distant stars, willing my blood to cool and the ache of desire to subside. It took a long time, and I cursed myself for a fool all over again, then laughed softly and went back into the inn, where I lay sleepless on my pallet until dawn came.
On the morrow, I was glad of my decision. We got an early start. Lucca was a bit less than a half-day's ride away, and Lucius was hoping to reach the city in time for our midday meal. Whatever misgivings he'd had about this marriage seemed to have vanished; or mayhap it was merely gladness at the prospect of returning home.
I had to own, it was beautiful country, marked by green mountains and vast stretches of fertile plains, glowing golden in the autumn light. We had to ascend to a fair height on the last leg of our journey. At one spot, Lucius pointed toward the west, where a castle was nestled in the crags of another distant range. It looked nigh unreachable.
"You see that?" he asked. "Valpetra. The city's on the far side, you can't see it from here. But that's Martelli's stronghold."
"Looks imposing," I offered.
He contemplated it. "It is."
"Is Lucca in the mountains?"
"No." Lucius grinned. "But it's imposing, too, in its own way. Did I tell you the city walls are