Life! By Design_ 6 Steps to an Extraordinary You - Laura Morton [18]
Think about a song that, every time you hear it, transports you back in time to a place, event, or person it reminds you of. Even a particular scent can bring you back in time. This is all part of how our senses anchor us to the past. Almost every reaction or action in our lives is a product of conditioning, experience, exposure, and the environment.
Becoming aware of these responses will help remove the self-induced struggle you face. It will help you understand that life is a continuous cycle of learning and growing and then understanding what you need to do so you can get better results in every area of your life.
Sounds easy, right? But it’s not, because most people are living in what I refer to as an active coma. They’re alive and functioning but appear to be plugged into an imaginary life support, hoping that someday when they wake up everything will be okay. Think about it: They’ve become victims of world circumstances and they’re doing little to nothing about it! They’re suffering with a poor economy, housing crises, politics, their finances or lack thereof, their relationships, their health, and their emotional well-being, just to name a few. And they’re stuck, concerned, worried, and afraid to break out from their comfort zone to take action. They’re afraid to change, afraid to try something new or try a new approach; they’re in a coma.
You’re living in a coma if you wake up at the same time every morning, read the newspaper, have breakfast, kiss someone goodbye (or not), get into the car or hop onto the bus or train, listen to the same thing on the radio or your iPod, take the same route every day, wear almost the same outfit you wore the day before, show up at the office, and do the same old routine over and over until it’s time to go home, where it might be meatloaf Monday or taco Tuesday. There’s no creativity in that kind of life and no expression of joy.
It’s important to note that while I am all about routines and habits, I am focused on those that bring you power and joy and move you one step closer to your goals and dreams.
I had a client who was in complete denial about her children’s obnoxious behavior. She told me that her family traveled with friends—but only once, because no one wanted to travel with them again after that. After her kids came home from play dates, other parents called to say that her child did this or that and made the other children cry. She took no responsibility for her kids’ behavior. She wouldn’t address the issues and couldn’t understand why everyone reacted so negatively to her children. Her husband was not aware of the problems either because he spent more time in front of the television or his computer than he did in the bedroom with his wife or spending quality time with his kids. And although my client was completely aware of her husband’s absence in their lives, still she said nothing to him. This is a classic example of a woman who is living in a coma. She doesn’t see things as they are. She doesn’t address reality. She doesn’t react to anything going on around her. She’s not doing anything wrong, her kids are perfect, and her husband is always there for her. Everything is “fantastic,” but her whole world is a lie.
Do you know anyone like this?
I used to coach a man, let’s call him Donald, who was consumed with his number one competitor in business because that company was consistently outperforming Donald’s. It was growing and thriving while Donald’s was shrinking and becoming irrelevant in the marketplace. Donald spent all of his time writing memos and reports to anyone who would