Life of Hon. Phineas T. Barnum [20]
surrounded by a mob of one hundred or more and his ears saluted with such remarks as "the lecherous old hypocrite," "the sanctified murderer," "the black-coated villain," "lynch him," "tar and feather him," and others still more harsh and threatening. Then one man seized him by the collar, while others brought a fence rail and some rope.
"Come," said the man who collared him, "old chap, you can't walk any further; we know you, and as we always make gentlemen ride in these parts, you may just prepare to straddle that rail!"
His surprise may be imagined. "Good heavens!" he exclaimed, as they all pressed around, "gentlemen, what have I done?"
"Oh, we know you," exclaimed half a dozen voices; "you needn't roll your sanctimonious eyes; that game don't take in this country. Come, straddle the rail, and REMEMBER THE STACK-YARD!"
He grew more and more bewildered; he could not imagine what possible offence he was to suffer for, and he continued to exclaim, "Gentlemen, what have I done? Don't kill me, gentlemen, but tell me what I have done."
"Come, make him straddle the rail; we'll show him how to hang poor factory girls," shouted a man in the crowd.
The man who had him by the collar then remarked "Come, MR. AVERY, it's no use; you see, we know you, and we'll give you a touch of lynch law, and start you for home again."
"My name is NOT Avery, gentlemen; you are mistaken in your man," he exclaimed.
"Come, come, none of your gammon; straddle the rail, Ephraim."
The rail was brought and Barnum was about to be placed on it, when the truth flashed upon him.
"Gentlemen," he exclaimed, "I am not Avery; I despise that villain as much as you can; my name is Barnum; I belong to the circus which arrived here last night, and I am sure Old Turner, my partner, has hoaxed you with this ridiculous story."
"If he has we'll lynch him," said one of the mob.
"Well, he has, I'll assure you, and if you will walk to the hotel with me, I'll convince you of the fact."
This they reluctantly assented to, keeping, however, a close hand upon him. As they walked up the main street, the mob received a re-enforcement of some fifty or sixty, and Barnum was marched like a malefactor up to the hotel. Old Turner stood on the piazza ready to explode with laughter. Barnum appealed to him for heaven's sake to explain this matter, that he might be liberated. He continued to laugh, but finally told them "he believed there was some mistake about it. The fact is," said he, "my friend Barnum has a new suit of black clothes on and he looks so much like a priest that I thought he must be Avery."
The crowd saw the joke and seemed satisfied. Barnum's new coat had been half-torn from his back, and he had been very roughly handled. But some of the crowd apologized for the outrage, declaring that Turner ought to be served in the same way, while others advised Barnum to "get even with him." Barnum was very much offended, and when the mob-dispersed he asked Turner what could have induced him to play such a trick.
"My dear Mr. Barnum," he replied, "it was all for our good. Remember, all we need to insure success is notoriety. You will see that this will be noised all about town as a trick played by one of the circus managers upon the other, and our pavilion will be crammed to-morrow night."
It was even so; the trick was told all over town, and every one came to see the circus managers who were in a habit of playing practical jokes upon each other. They had fine audiences while they remained at Annapolis, but it was a long time before Barnum forgave Turner for his rascally "joke."
CHAPTER VI. INCIDENTS OF A CIRCUS TOUR.
BEATING A LANDLORD--A JOKE ON TURNER--BARNUM AS A PREACHER AND AS A NEGRO MINSTREL--A BAD MAN WITH A GUN--DEALING WITH A SHERIFF--"LADY HAYES"--AN EMBARASSED JUGGLER--BARNUM AS A MATRIMONIAL AGENT.
At almost every place visited by the travelling company, some notable incident occurred. At Hanover Court House, Virginia, for example, it was raining so heavily that they could not give a performance, and Turner
"Come," said the man who collared him, "old chap, you can't walk any further; we know you, and as we always make gentlemen ride in these parts, you may just prepare to straddle that rail!"
His surprise may be imagined. "Good heavens!" he exclaimed, as they all pressed around, "gentlemen, what have I done?"
"Oh, we know you," exclaimed half a dozen voices; "you needn't roll your sanctimonious eyes; that game don't take in this country. Come, straddle the rail, and REMEMBER THE STACK-YARD!"
He grew more and more bewildered; he could not imagine what possible offence he was to suffer for, and he continued to exclaim, "Gentlemen, what have I done? Don't kill me, gentlemen, but tell me what I have done."
"Come, make him straddle the rail; we'll show him how to hang poor factory girls," shouted a man in the crowd.
The man who had him by the collar then remarked "Come, MR. AVERY, it's no use; you see, we know you, and we'll give you a touch of lynch law, and start you for home again."
"My name is NOT Avery, gentlemen; you are mistaken in your man," he exclaimed.
"Come, come, none of your gammon; straddle the rail, Ephraim."
The rail was brought and Barnum was about to be placed on it, when the truth flashed upon him.
"Gentlemen," he exclaimed, "I am not Avery; I despise that villain as much as you can; my name is Barnum; I belong to the circus which arrived here last night, and I am sure Old Turner, my partner, has hoaxed you with this ridiculous story."
"If he has we'll lynch him," said one of the mob.
"Well, he has, I'll assure you, and if you will walk to the hotel with me, I'll convince you of the fact."
This they reluctantly assented to, keeping, however, a close hand upon him. As they walked up the main street, the mob received a re-enforcement of some fifty or sixty, and Barnum was marched like a malefactor up to the hotel. Old Turner stood on the piazza ready to explode with laughter. Barnum appealed to him for heaven's sake to explain this matter, that he might be liberated. He continued to laugh, but finally told them "he believed there was some mistake about it. The fact is," said he, "my friend Barnum has a new suit of black clothes on and he looks so much like a priest that I thought he must be Avery."
The crowd saw the joke and seemed satisfied. Barnum's new coat had been half-torn from his back, and he had been very roughly handled. But some of the crowd apologized for the outrage, declaring that Turner ought to be served in the same way, while others advised Barnum to "get even with him." Barnum was very much offended, and when the mob-dispersed he asked Turner what could have induced him to play such a trick.
"My dear Mr. Barnum," he replied, "it was all for our good. Remember, all we need to insure success is notoriety. You will see that this will be noised all about town as a trick played by one of the circus managers upon the other, and our pavilion will be crammed to-morrow night."
It was even so; the trick was told all over town, and every one came to see the circus managers who were in a habit of playing practical jokes upon each other. They had fine audiences while they remained at Annapolis, but it was a long time before Barnum forgave Turner for his rascally "joke."
CHAPTER VI. INCIDENTS OF A CIRCUS TOUR.
BEATING A LANDLORD--A JOKE ON TURNER--BARNUM AS A PREACHER AND AS A NEGRO MINSTREL--A BAD MAN WITH A GUN--DEALING WITH A SHERIFF--"LADY HAYES"--AN EMBARASSED JUGGLER--BARNUM AS A MATRIMONIAL AGENT.
At almost every place visited by the travelling company, some notable incident occurred. At Hanover Court House, Virginia, for example, it was raining so heavily that they could not give a performance, and Turner