Lincoln's Yarns and Stories [48]
River in North Carolina, in a tugboat, a Federal picket yelled out, "What have you got on board of that tug?"
The severe and dignified answer was, "The Secretaty of War and Major-General Foster."
Instantly the picket roared back, "We've got Major-Generals enough up here. Why don't you bring us up some hardtack?"
GOT THE PREACHER.
A story told by a Cabinet member tended to show how accurately Lincoln could calculate political results in advance--a faculty which remained with him all his life.
"A friend, who was a Democrat, had come to him early in the canvass and told him he wanted to see him elected, but did not like to vote against his party; still he would vote for him, if the contest was to be so close that every vote was needed.
"A short time before the election Lincoln said to him: 'I have got the preacher, and I don't want your vote.'"
BIG JOKE ON HALLECK.
When General Halleck was Commander-in-Chief of the Union forces, with headquarters at Washington, President Lincoln unconsciously played a big practical joke upon that dignified officer. The President had spent the night at the Soldiers' Home, and the next morning asked Captain Derickson, commanding the company of Pennsylvania soldiers, which was the Presidential guard at the White House and the Home--wherever the President happened to be --to go to town with him.
Captain Derickson told the story in a most entertaining way:
"When we entered the city, Mr. Lincoln said he would call at General Halleck's headquarters and get what news had been received from the army during the night. I informed him that General Cullum, chief aid to General Halleck, was raised in Meadville, and that I knew him when I was a boy.
"He replied, 'Then we must see both the gentlemen.' When the carriage stopped, he requested me to remain seated, and said he would bring the gentlemen down to see me, the office being on the second floor. In a short time the President came down, followed by the other gentlemen. When he introduced them to me, General Cullum recognized and seemed pleased to see me.
"In General Halleck I thought I discovered a kind of quizzical look, as much as to say, 'Isn't this rather a big joke to ask the Commander-in-Chief of the army down to the street to be introduced to a country captain?'"
STORIES BETTER THAN DOCTORS.
A gentleman, visiting a hospital at Washington, heard an occupant of one of the beds laughing and talking about the President, who had been there a short time before and gladdened the wounded with some of his stories. The soldier seemed in such good spirits that the gentleman inquired:
"You must be very slightly wounded?"
"Yes," replied the brave fellow, "very slightly--I have only lost one leg, and I'd be glad enough to lose the other, if I could hear some more of 'Old Abe's' stories."
SHORT, BUT EXCITING.
William B. Wilson, employed in the telegraph office at the War Department, ran over to the White House one day to summon Mr. Lincoln. He described the trip back to the War Department in this manner:
"Calling one of his two younger boys to join him, we then started from the White House, between stately trees, along a gravel path which led to the rear of the old War Department building. It was a warm day, and Mr. Lincoln wore as part of his costume a faded gray linen duster which hung loosely around his long gaunt frame; his kindly eye was beaming with good nature, and his ever-thoughtful brow was unruffled.
"We had barely reached the gravel walk before he stooped over, picked up a round smooth pebble, and shooting it off his thumb, challenged us to a game of 'followings,' which we accepted. Each in turn tried to hit the outlying stone, which was being constantly projected onward by the President. The game was short, but exciting; the cheerfulness of childhood, the ambition of young manhood, and the gravity of the statesman were all injected into it.
"The game was not won until the steps of the War Department were reached. Every inch of progression was toughly contested, and when the President
The severe and dignified answer was, "The Secretaty of War and Major-General Foster."
Instantly the picket roared back, "We've got Major-Generals enough up here. Why don't you bring us up some hardtack?"
GOT THE PREACHER.
A story told by a Cabinet member tended to show how accurately Lincoln could calculate political results in advance--a faculty which remained with him all his life.
"A friend, who was a Democrat, had come to him early in the canvass and told him he wanted to see him elected, but did not like to vote against his party; still he would vote for him, if the contest was to be so close that every vote was needed.
"A short time before the election Lincoln said to him: 'I have got the preacher, and I don't want your vote.'"
BIG JOKE ON HALLECK.
When General Halleck was Commander-in-Chief of the Union forces, with headquarters at Washington, President Lincoln unconsciously played a big practical joke upon that dignified officer. The President had spent the night at the Soldiers' Home, and the next morning asked Captain Derickson, commanding the company of Pennsylvania soldiers, which was the Presidential guard at the White House and the Home--wherever the President happened to be --to go to town with him.
Captain Derickson told the story in a most entertaining way:
"When we entered the city, Mr. Lincoln said he would call at General Halleck's headquarters and get what news had been received from the army during the night. I informed him that General Cullum, chief aid to General Halleck, was raised in Meadville, and that I knew him when I was a boy.
"He replied, 'Then we must see both the gentlemen.' When the carriage stopped, he requested me to remain seated, and said he would bring the gentlemen down to see me, the office being on the second floor. In a short time the President came down, followed by the other gentlemen. When he introduced them to me, General Cullum recognized and seemed pleased to see me.
"In General Halleck I thought I discovered a kind of quizzical look, as much as to say, 'Isn't this rather a big joke to ask the Commander-in-Chief of the army down to the street to be introduced to a country captain?'"
STORIES BETTER THAN DOCTORS.
A gentleman, visiting a hospital at Washington, heard an occupant of one of the beds laughing and talking about the President, who had been there a short time before and gladdened the wounded with some of his stories. The soldier seemed in such good spirits that the gentleman inquired:
"You must be very slightly wounded?"
"Yes," replied the brave fellow, "very slightly--I have only lost one leg, and I'd be glad enough to lose the other, if I could hear some more of 'Old Abe's' stories."
SHORT, BUT EXCITING.
William B. Wilson, employed in the telegraph office at the War Department, ran over to the White House one day to summon Mr. Lincoln. He described the trip back to the War Department in this manner:
"Calling one of his two younger boys to join him, we then started from the White House, between stately trees, along a gravel path which led to the rear of the old War Department building. It was a warm day, and Mr. Lincoln wore as part of his costume a faded gray linen duster which hung loosely around his long gaunt frame; his kindly eye was beaming with good nature, and his ever-thoughtful brow was unruffled.
"We had barely reached the gravel walk before he stooped over, picked up a round smooth pebble, and shooting it off his thumb, challenged us to a game of 'followings,' which we accepted. Each in turn tried to hit the outlying stone, which was being constantly projected onward by the President. The game was short, but exciting; the cheerfulness of childhood, the ambition of young manhood, and the gravity of the statesman were all injected into it.
"The game was not won until the steps of the War Department were reached. Every inch of progression was toughly contested, and when the President