Lion's Bride - Iris Johansen [31]
He didn’t answer.
She wanted to shake him. “Why not let me go? You don’t want me here. I’ve scarcely seen you since you brought me my mulberry leaves.”
He glanced at her. “Did you wish me to amuse you?”
She spoke through clenched teeth. “No, I don’t wish you to amuse me. You wouldn’t know how. All you know is war and coupling.”
“War is not amusing, but coupling can be—” He shook his head. “No, that’s not amusing either. When the need is upon me, it’s too intense to smile about.”
He seldom smiled at anything but Kadar’s quips. Yet he had smiled that night she had come upon him with Tasza. Did only drunkenness rid him of grimness? No, even that night she had been aware of bitterness surrounding him like a dark cloud.
“If you want amusement, go to Kadar,” he said. “Stay away from me.”
“I’ll not stay away from you. Not until you tell Kadar to take me to Damascus.”
“He wants you here. He thinks you’ll not be safe until he knows everything about you. Tell him what he wants to know and you’ll go to Damascus the next day.” He met her stare. “As for me, I don’t care where you came from or what dangers you face. You don’t belong here. You’re right, I know only war and coupling. You cannot fight for me, and that only leaves one use.” His gaze went to her breasts, and he said without inflection, “I grow hard when I look at you. If you stay here much longer, I’ll probably take you to my bed.”
The crude boldness shocked her, but no more than her own physical response. Her breasts were swelling beneath his gaze as if he were stroking her. She could feel her nipples hardening, pressing against the soft cotton of her gown. Could he see that betraying response in the bright flare of the torches? she wondered. Probably. His gaze was narrowing, his mouth curving with that same heavy sensuality she had seen in the hall that night.
“Every time I take a woman now, I want it to be you. At first I thought it because I was growing bored with Tasza, but I’ve tried two others and it’s the same.” He said thickly, “I want them all to be you. I want you to open your thighs and let me stroke you. I remember how soft your woman’s fleece looked. I want to feel it against me as I move in and out of—”
“Stop.” Her voice was strangled. “This is not…decent.”
“Look at yourself. You want it.”
“No, I don’t.” She tried to steady her voice. “I’ll not be one of your women. I won’t be any man’s property. I’m going to have my own embroidery house and be free to live life as I please.”
His gaze at last lifted from her breasts to her face. “Then stay away from me.” He turned back to the mountains. “And tell Kadar what he wants to know. I’ve let Kadar have his way in this, but I’ve little patience. If you stay much longer, I will have my way.”
“It’s none of your concern what life I left behind me. If you don’t let me go, I’ll find a way of leaving anyway. I’ll not let you—What is that glow?”
His gaze never left the third mountain. “Just a campfire.”
The answer barely registered as she leaned over the battlement to see better. “No, not there. To the south.”
He stiffened. “My God.” He turned on his heel and strode toward the door leading off the battlement.
She hurried after him. “What is it?”
“Jedha. The village is burning.”
“The village…”
The families of all the soldiers who guarded this fortress lived in the village.
He had sent Haroun back to Jedha.
She flew down the steps after him. “I’m going with you.”
“No.”
“I’m going.”
He turned to look at her. “I’ve no time for this. Do what you wish. God knows, you may be as safe there as here.”
“I’ll get salves and linens.” She ran down the corridor to the scullery. “Jasmine!”
The courtyard was filled with armored soldiers and milling horses when Thea rushed out the door a short time later.
Her gaze searched the courtyard until she found Kadar.
“Kadar!”
He walked his horse up to her.
“May I ride with you?”
He glanced at Ware, who was now mounting his horse across the courtyard. “I think you should stay here. We don’t know what we’ll encounter at