Lion's Bride - Iris Johansen [94]
Ware suddenly smiled slyly. “Do you know what I thought of you when we first met? I thought you were the lover of some powerful monk or priest, perhaps even a cardinal.”
Vaden’s eyes widened. “You thought me a sodomite?”
“It was possible. I could think of no other reason for the Templars to break their rules to allow you entrance. It would have been a safe place for a jealous lover to send you, because everyone knows the Templars aren’t corrupted in that way.” He tilted his head in appraisal. “And you were certainly comely enough to attract anyone’s attention.”
“Thank you.” Vaden did not sound grateful. “I am not a sodomite.”
Ware’s lips twitched. He had evidently touched a sensitive spot. “It was only a first impression.”
“And a stupid judgment.” He added dryly, “But it puts an entirely new light on your persistence in welcoming me into your circle. Perhaps I was in error regarding your brotherly love for me.”
As usual, Vaden had turned the tables. He was never at a disadvantage for long. It was one of the qualities Ware had found most appealing in him. “No, you were not in error. I could not have loved a brother more.” He could have bitten his tongue. Christ, next he would be sniveling like a babe. “But, then, I was only a boy and had little discernment. I no longer intrude where I’m not wanted.”
“I didn’t say it was an intrusion.” Before he could reply, Vaden was rising to his feet. “And now I bid you good-bye. Don’t come to me in truce again. I won’t honor it.”
Ware looked back at the flames. “Yes, you will.”
“You’re still laboring under the false assumption that I’m an honorable man. It may be the death of you. I fully intend to kill you, Ware.”
“And probably will someday.” He reached out and poked at the wood with the stick. “But you’re having a good deal of trouble bestirring yourself to do it. In all this time you must have had opportunities. I know I gave you at least one.”
“I had my reasons for holding my hand.”
“And you’re a patient man.” He lifted his gaze to Vaden’s face. “But not that patient. I often wonder what you think about when you sit at your campfire at night.”
Vaden smiled mockingly. “You shouldn’t flatter yourself that you’re my only concern. It’s true you’ve been designated my primary duty, but the Grand Master makes use of my sword when he needs it. For instance, I go to battle at Acre tomorrow.”
“And when you return to your duty here?”
“I meditate. I read the scrolls of scholars.” He paused. “I wait.”
“Not a life you’d choose. I’d think you’d want to hurry and complete the task. Could it be you’re having doubts?”
“I never have doubts once I’ve set upon a course. You should remember that about me, Ware. Have you ever seen me waver?”
“I’ve never seen it. That doesn’t mean you’ve never done it.”
Vaden’s smile vanished. “I cannot waver in this. Don’t make the mistake of thinking I’m softening because I choose not to complete my mission until I see fit. I warn you, the woman will live only as long as I perceive her as no danger.”
“And you won’t live for a day after I hear you’ve killed her.”
“Ah, Ware, and you say she means nothing to you but responsibility?” Vaden shook his head. “Perhaps I was wrong. It may be the woman, not I, who will be the death of you.”
He moved out of the firelight and faded into the shadows.
Silence. Only the crackle of the wood on the fire sounded in the night air.
Loneliness.
By the saints, he was mad. He should be filled with hatred and thoughts of revenge. Vaden was his enemy and that time of friendship was gone. When would he learn to give up those memories and realize Vaden meant what he said?
Tonight. From now on he would regard Vaden as any other enemy. To do anything else would endanger Dundragon and Thea. He must close away this sense of loss and behave with sanity.
The entire world was a barren place. To accept that Vaden was his enemy did not make the loneliness more desolate.
It only seemed to make it weigh heavier, much heavier.
Kadar visited El Sunan four times in the six months following Thea’s and Selene