Living My Life - Emma Goldman [180]
This demonstration was the beginning of a city-wide campaign for the unemployed. Sasha, whose valour had endeared him to everyone who knew about his life, was its organizing and directing influence. In his tireless efforts he had the support of a large number of our young rebels, who vigorously worked with him.
My Berkeley Theatre series brought some interesting and amusing experiences. [ ... ] The last Sunday at the Berkeley Theatre was turned into a gala night. Leonard D. Abbott3 presided, and among the speakers were the noted actress Mary Shaw,4 the first to defy American purists with her performances of Ghosts and of Mrs. Warren’s Profession; Fola La Follette, gifted and frankly outspoken; and George Middleton, who had a volume of one-act plays to his credit.5 They dwelt on what the drama meant to them, and what a powerful factor it was in awakening social consciousness in people who might not be reached in any other way. They were very appreciative of my work, and I was grateful to them for making me feel that my efforts had brought some of the American intelligentsia into closer rapport with the struggle of the masses. [ ... ] A young man named Paul Munter [ ... ] attended my entire series, for six weeks, and at the end presented me with my course in perfectly typewritten sheets.
Paul’s gift proved to be of great value in the preparation of my manuscript of The Social Significance of the Modern Drama.6 Thanks to it the work was less difficult than the writing of my essays, though I had been in a more tranquil state of mind then; I still had hopes of a harmonious life with Ben. Little was left of that hope now. Perhaps therefore I clung more tenaciously to its remaining shreds. Ben’s pleading letters from Chicago added fuel to the smouldering fires of my longing. After two months I began to realize the wisdom of the Russian peasant saying: “If you drink, you’ll die, and if you don’t drink, you’ll die. Better drink and die.”
To be away from Ben meant sleepless nights, restless days, sickening yearning. To be near him involved conflict and strife, daily denial of my pride. But it also meant ecstasy and renewed vigour for my work. I would have Ben and go with him on tour again, I decided. If the price was high, I would pay it; but I would drink, I would drink! [ ... ]
My drama book was off the press, looking quite attractive in its simple attire. It was the first English volume of its kind to point out the social meaning of thirty-two plays by eighteen authors of different countries. My only regret was that my own adopted land had to be left out. I had tried diligently to find some American dramatist who could be placed alongside the great Europeans, but I could discover no one. [ ... ] The dramatic master [ ... ] was not yet in sight. He would no doubt appear some day, but meanwhile I had to be content with calling the attention of America to the works of the foremost playwrights of Europe and the social significance of modern dramatic art. [ ... ]
CHAPTER XLI
[ ... ] While Ben and I were busy with our meetings in the West, Sasha was engaged in strenuous activities in New York. With Fitzi, Leonard D. Abbott, the comrades of anarchist groups, and the young members of the Ferrer School he was conducting the unemployed movement and the anti-militarist campaign. Their persistency in fighting for free speech in New York had resulted in the repeated breaking up of their gatherings by mounted police, involving incredible brutality and violence. [ ... ]
I eagerly scanned the papers from New York. I had no anxiety about Sasha, for I knew how dependable and cool he was in times