Lost Era 05_ Deny thy Father - Jeff Mariotte [35]
You did what you could, he told himself, sipping from his steaming mug. Given who you were-who you are-you made your best possible effort.
He had told himself that many times, over the years. As always, he wondered if it was true. Wasn’t there something more he could have given of himself, some other heroic effort he could have made had he only thought of it? Was there some other expert to whom he could have turned for advice and guidance? If he had stayed, instead of leaving-running away, he now understood, as he was running again-during Will’s fifteenth year, could they have reached some new plateau of understanding and acceptance?
Kyle shook his head fiercely. Those were questions of the past. While the past could be visited, with considerable difficulty, it could not be substantively changed, so it did no good to dwell on those matters. Kyle had never considered himself a great intellect, but he was a great problem solver. He didn’t like wrestling with issues that had no solutions. Instead, he did what he always did at such times, visualized his mind as a series of boxes. He took his thoughts of young Will Riker, tucked them deep into one of those boxes, and closed the lid on them.
Chapter 10
By the time they had all come down from the hills of Twin Peaks, the sun was sinking toward the ocean and the air was getting colder. “I’m hungry,” Dennis Haynes said when they met up. “What about the rest of you?”
“I could stand something to eat,” Boon replied.
“Me too,” Estresor Fil said. For her, food was often a matter of urgency. With her tiny size and fast metabolism, every meal was processed quickly, and she couldn’t wait too long for the next. Even as they’d made their way to Twin Peaks she had snacked now and again. When she needed food her patience grew short and so, Will had noticed, did her sentences. “Really hungry.”
“We should eat something, and find some shelter for the night,” Dennis suggested. “We can brainstorm on the new clue while we rest and hit it first thing in the morning.”
Will was glad to see that Dennis was finally taking a leadership position. “Do you think the other squadrons are doing one a day?” he wondered.
“That’s what it should average out to, anyway,” Dennis reminded him. “Five clues, five days, right?”
“That’s true,” Felicia said. “So we might as well pace ourselves.”
“Does anyone have any ideas for a place to sleep?” Dennis asked.
“There are several public shelters,” Estresor Fil pointed out. “That we can find after we eat.”
Dennis laughed, getting the point. “Okay, let’s go feed ourselves,” he said, starting back toward the city itself. Everyone else followed.
“I think we should avoid the public shelters, though,” Will suggested. “The other squadrons might be there.”
“So?”
“So you really think they won’t try to sabotage us if they see us?”
“We could do the same to them,” Boon offered.
“I’d rather try to win fairly,” Felicia put in. “Without doing anything to hurt anyone else’s chances, just by being the best.”
Boon pretended to stifle a yawn. “That’s no fun, Felicia.”
She shot him an angry glare. “You may not think so, Boon. But it’s the way I’d like to play it, and I think it’s the way Admiral Paris wants it. If you don’t think so, maybe you should reconsider a Starfleet career.”
Boon stopped in the middle of the street, pulling himself up to his considerable height, and loomed over Felicia. “Don’t be so sure of yourself,” he said, his voice low and rumbling. Will wondered if he should intercede, but then decided that if Boon moved from menacing to actual violence, Felicia would be able to handle him. “Sure, they talk about fair play and honor and integrity and all that stuff, but you think they really mean it? When the chips are down and it’s them or you, you’d better do whatever is necessary to make sure you walk away and they don’t.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about!” Dennis said. “Starfleet doesn’t just talk about integrity; they