Loving - Henry Green [90]
to have her out of that awful air raid business. I know he's never been over Peterboro' yet but the way he's going it might be any minute now. I said she could do worse than come here and told 'er what you and I had thought of. It would be a weight off my mind I said and how you would look after 'er better than my sister Bell ever did.' 'Well what did she say?' 'I got the letter here,' he said. 'She writes she reckons that would be cowardly or something.' 'Can I see it?' she requested serious. 'No I won't show it to you,' he answered. 'Then there's matters disobligin' about me in it,' she cried. 'To tell you the truth there's no mention of you at all.' 'Well whoever's heard,' she exclaimed. 'I can't understand that part,' he went on. 'I said as clear as clear We were thinkin' of getting married but it's just as if she'd never bothered to read to the bottom.' 'Well I never,' Edith said cautious. 'It's that bit about being afraid that gets me,' he muttered. 'Afraid to marry me she means?' 'Not on your life. I told you she never mentioned you Edie. No she reckons we're 'iding ourselves away in this neutral country.' 'Here let me read it.' 'No mate I don't want you to get a wrong impression of the old lady, seeing that we're to be man and wife.' 'Your sister's put her up to it,' she said. 'My sister Bell?' he laughed. 'You wait till you meet.' 'You don't love me,' she wailed. 'Oh honey,' he said with a sigh, 'you'll never know how much I do.' But he made no move towards her. She had gone quite white. She chanced a quick look at him, noted that he seemed exhausted. 'Why dearest,' she exclaimed, 'd'you feel all right?' 'It's our plans,' he said. 'We'd just about got everything settled when this comes along.' 'But we could live here without your mother,' she pleaded. 'Oh you don't realize how I'll look after you,' she went on, 'and by this means I'll have twice the time to do it. Because I was never aiming to give up work at the Castle. Mrs Tennant can't get help. She'll be glad to have me over six days a week only the seventh I must keep for our washin'.' He leant over to kiss her. She allowed it. Then she interrupted him. 'No Charley,' she said, 'we got to discuss this.' 'She's funny that way,' he remarked as though in a dream. 'What are you getting at?' she asked sharp. 'She's obstinate mother is. Always was. I remember when the old man wanted to chuck his job on the railway because 'e'd been made a good offer I can't exactly remember where now but I know if would've meant more money. Well she wouldn't 'ear of it, wouldn't even let it be mentioned twice. They had a rare argument at the time. I was only a kid but I can hear them now. But she got her way. He stayed where 'e was. And I couldn't say that he lost by so doing.' 'Yet she wishes us to throw this place up.' 'Yes Edie, but it's different this time.' 'I'm that bewildered,' she said. 'Now love,' he said in a voice that was weak with exhaustion, 'you're not to worry." 'But we'd laid all our plans,' she objected and seemed to be righting back the tears. Then she gave way. 'Oh our little 'ouse,' she sobbed. She turned to him like a child, and held out her arms. With a quick movement she got onto his knees. She merged into him and � copiously wept. 'There sweet'eart there,' he comforted. She was crying noisily. He appeared to grope for words. 'Don't take on love,' he said. He shifted his legs as though the weight was beginning to tell. 'This would occur just when I'm not quite up to the mark,' he exclaimed. She gave no sign of having heard. There's other places,' he tried to appease her. 'We'll find you a lovely home,' he ended, and fell silent. 'Don't stop,' she sobbed into his ear. 'Why,' he said, 'I love you more than I thought I was capable. I'm surprised at myself, honest I am. If my old mother could see her Charley now she'd never recognize 'im,' he murmured. She at once got off his knees. She started blowing her nose and cleaning up. He leant forward, gazed awkward into her face. 'I never seen anything like your eyes they're so 'uge not in all my experience,' he announced